The Trains Of Mumbai

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Anjali's gaze rested on Aman's free hand on his thigh that he had tightly fist while he drove the car. The hug helped the tension in him cool down but it was rising back to surface slowly which could be observed by the way his jaw kept on clenching and unclenching.

Anjali sighed and reached for his hand, the knuckles were now pale with a pinkish hue. Aman did not say a word after they broke from their hug, he simply opened the passenger door for her to move in and now here they were.

Aman's gaze flicked over their hands and then to her lap where she held his hand between both of hers before he looked at the road again.

Maybe he was still overwhelmed about the day and needed some time and space to clear his head. Maybe he just needed some comfort and silence. She thought.

The thought of needing space vanished when she found him taking a route that was not the way to her house. She simply looked down to his still fisted hand that was clutched between both of hers and she caressed his knuckles before slowly opening his fist and pressed her palm against his.

"I know you don't feel to discuss about what happened and I also know there's something more about this. I understand, take your time just stay with me."

Aman let out an another sigh of relief and intertwined his fingers with hers in response. He pressed them when Anjali said nothing but looked out of the window towards the sea coming into view.

Anjali drew soothing cricles on the back of his hand. He had took her to their comfort spot.

_______

Their hands intertwined as they walked towards their secluded spot and sat down on the cool sand.

Aman furrowed his eyebrows at Anjali when she pulled away her fingers from his. She merely shrugged and wrapped her arm around his, while resting her head against his shoulder.

She chuckled when he reached for her other hand and intertwined their fingers again, a small smile hung on his lips and he playfully hit her head with his.

For a few moments they shared a comfortable silence before Aman decided to finally open up about his past.

"I no longer stay with my family. We broke apart years ago. They wanted me to join the family business and I wanted to choose something else for myself. Shit went down, they kinda disowned me. They cut off my finances and asked me to pay fees for my degree on own if I was so passionate about it, hoping they would be able to knock some sense into me but well I,...I was sure about what I wanted and took the step that tore apart my relationship with them."

He said this so casually which was opposite to the storm whisking inside him. Anjali couldn't help but gasp at his confession, she tightened her hold onto his arm urging him to continue.

"It's been years to this...and..I..

"I have been on my own. Whatever life threw, I took it. I had selectively a few people in my life after what happened, but...no one who I could take care of or no one who took care of me. When I was sick or depressed or whatever, it was just me."

"Then today when the accident happened might be the first time after ages that I felt responsible for someone’s life and I lost it. I knew I could not just disappoint someone again who was close to me."

Tears streamed down her cheeks and her heart broke with every sentence he spoke.

She did not have the courage to even look at him until he pulled her chin towards him. His voice was broken but there was not a single tear in his eyes, it was like he was used to this pain and there were no tears left to shed.

"I'm sorry you are learning it this way but I am so grateful to have you by my side today, thank you so much Anjali because I wouldn't have been able to stay sane if it were not you to hold onto."

Anjali could feel the damn burst and she threw her arms around him and sobbed.

"I am so sorry, so sorry I wasn't there when you needed me Aman...when you were alone...when you needed me the most and I left...Aman I-

"Anjali, shh listen to me. You are at no fault here." She sobbed harder when he hugged her and started patting her back to calm her.

The pieces of her heart were all over, her chest constricted in pain for the man she had always loved.

"No Aman, I don't deserve this, I-

She tried to pull away from him, feeling ashamed about herself.  He was always there when she needed him, when it was her turn to stay with him, when he really needed her where the fuck was she?

He did not let her pull away infact pulled her deeper into his arms,

"Please don't leave me, I need you Anjali."

Her vision completely blurred and she found herself  clinging onto him as tight as he clinged onto her.

( I am unable to add any GIFs 😭 )