All About Me

:O

so like where do i even start? I don't even know if anyone will ever see this lol if not cool but if you're here 'welcome' :D 

I've always loved to draw. ever since I was a kid i would always find some random person to draw. i remember being around 13 drawing danny phantom comics with a friend. we would spend HOURS making comics it was honestly one of my favorite parts of my childhood. drawing was a way for me to get away from the world. I would get lost in my mind and it would be all i could ever think about lol

I wasn't really like the other kids. mostly because when I was in 1st grade I got diagnosed with ADHD and with it being the early 2000s medicine was still pretty new and with my mom being the way she was (I'll get into that in a second) believed she just had to put me on the meds without really understanding what the drawbacks could be.  

see I can only remember only a small portion of my childhood. anything that happened  from 1st grade to high is a blur. except for a few times in 5th grade and 8th grade only because I bullied real bad. but other then that nothing. my best friend (who I've known since i was 5, 29 now lol) will tell me things that we've done together during that time and I won't remember a thing. 

its sad really because i will try so hard to remember but nothing really comes back to me.  though i understand why i was put on the meds I just wish mom did more research into what was being put into my body. because not only did she have me taking the ADHD meds but she would have me take another set of meds after school and another before bed. It just seemed like i was always taking pills and it got to the point where she would panic if i didn't take them. 

I don't think i really learned how to be a person until after I moved out at 23 and even then i was struggling to function. see growing up I was never really taught anything. mom and dad had me later in life. Dad being 53 and mom being 37. they already had 3 boys before me who were 19, 16 and 13 by the time i was born. not only that dad had two other children with his ex wife 0_0; so they really were trying to deal with another kid really.

honestly before I got the ADHD diagnosis things seemed fine from my point of view. I went outside and played like other kids my age but once i got hit with the ADHD I wasn't able to do anything. Dad seemed to pull back from me and mom treated me like i was a helpless slow child who couldn't do anything for themselves. 

again i understand why she put me on the meds i just wish it wasn't so much. i still have mixed feeling about how she went about handing it but at the end of the day I can't change how it happened only how I move though life now. 

i always try to look for a lesson in the things that I go though. to me the take away would be to look into what's going into you body. ask as many questions' as you can so you know what to look for when things like that start happening to you. never let the things from your past bring you down.

i am so happy with my life now and look forward to everyday :)