Little Things

TWO || COOKING - A SKILL OR A PARAMETER

WHAT IS COOKING?

Nowadays cooking is considered a skill that one needs to know to survive in time of need to live in this harsh and cruel world. However, in the past, it wasn't the case.

At that time, cooking was a parameter which played an important role in signifying men and women's role in the society. Because in that era, women only role was to cook for their family and take care of their needs. Her little world was limited within her house and her kitchen. Beyond that everything felt new and unknown to her. Then did she dislike it?

Probably not. She probably liked it more than anything. She probably loved cooking and taking care of her family. Even if her world was small and limited within her house and kitchen, she probably loved more than one could think.

Then what changed? Why did she stopped doing what she used to do? Why did she stopped playing her role?

She didn't. She is still playing her role but her role has changed. She has changed and what changed her was the fact, she was never appreciated for her hard work. Her hard work had always been seen as a something meaningless and useless. Because that was her duty and fulfilling her duties is one of her responsibilities. And there is no reason to be appreciated for doing what you are supposed to do.

After hearing those words over and over again, something triggered in her. Her heart ached with pain, she couldn't cry or tell anyone her pain or struggles. No matter how tired or exhausted she felt, she couldn't take a break. She had to do this, do that. And when her patience run out, she couldn't hold it anymore.

The lack of appreciation and respect from the people she loved and took care of, made her worthless. She felt that she wasted her life for nothing, she felt worthless. Even if she worked from a day to night, no one noticed. No one cared how hard each day was for her. Thus, she began to feel suffocating and caged within her home, her safe space.

It doesn't matter what she can do, people only see her as someone whose only duty is to cook food for them, nothing more than that. To everyone, cooking is the only thing that defined her and her identity as a woman.

But she knows, knows very well in her heart that cooking is just one of her abilities, it's not all of her. She's a mother, a wife, a daughter and a woman. But her abilities aren't limited to cooking. She can do anything if she puts her mind into it. It's just everyone around her dragged her down, either it's men or women. While women passed their generational trauma to her and men tried to keep women beneath them.

It wasn't easy for her to rise, rise above all ordeals, fighting against with the society and its' people. But this time, she won't give up. She will rise, rise like a phoenix. And with time, she did.

However, with time, she started to hate kitchen and cooking, it wasn't out of anger. Rather, she felt like she's in shackle when they are in kitchen. She wanted to explore and gain experience. She didn't want to live a life of misery and self-loathe. She didn't want to become a person whose only identity is her cooking. She wanted to be loved and appreciation, but being a homemaker isn't appreciated in our society. It just one of her responsibilities, a duty she needs to fulfill.

While men are often told that kitchen and cooking aren't meant for them, it belonged to women. So, they never knew the struggle and hard work of a woman. They never understood how hard it was for women to pass each day in such places, even when they were ill. They never understood that the world of woman was always small. To her, the outside world is an unknown territory, a new world; completely different from their small world which is limited within their home and kitchen.

But for men, cooking is a liberation from their deep-rooted tradition, it made them feel they have achieved something that wasn't meant for them. Not only that, men who knows how to cook are often appreciated by the people around them, especially by women. That is why they never saw cooking has a shackle or chain that is binding them or stopping them for achieving their dreams.

Time has changed so the way people see cooking, nowadays, has also changed. Cooking no longer seen as a homemaker's job in this era. Cooking has become an art. But even to this, the homemaker's job is seen as something insignificant.

Nowadays, women are only respected if they have a proper job but they shouldn't be too career oriented or ambitious. They are always some rules set by society for women to follow. But even to this day, appreciating a woman for their hard work seems a tedious task, especially if she is a housewife.

The worse thing is that it's not only men, but also women who leave no chance to drag other women down. Why? Why is it hard for women to be appreciated and loved? Why women needed to be changed herself for the love and appreciation, for the sake of society?

What a irony is that even though time has changed, a woman's identity is still deeply linked with cooking. Even in modern day, she still needs to know cook, not for herself, to be someone's wife and daughter-in-law.  

_________________
_________________

a/n : this story written from a certain perspective on a certain topic. it targets certain issue, however, your opinion can be different from my own. so, don't feel offended.

it's written to show the relationship between cooking and women over the time and how it impacted their roles in society.