Fear Me - Bill Kaulitz

Go!

"Are you ready, Kiana?" asked my manager and sister Akane, who was just as nervous as I was. "Girl, I understand that you're really nervous, but you've got this."

I peeked my head out and saw the 400.000 people waiting for me to come out, including famous singers like Mariah Carey, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Brandy, and other singers I respect a lot, but the one who really made me nervous was Bill Kaulitz; I admired him so much, and I wanted this night to be perfect, for my fans, my favourite artists and for him.

I sighed "I'm ready."

Akane nodded and gave me a hug. I owed her everything and more; thanks to her I'm here.

"We're in 3..." Each second seemed like an eternity, damn it. "2..." It has to be perfect, I can't fail. "1..." It was two hard months of preparation that will be worth something. "Go!" Come on!

The dancers started to come out and mingle with each other so that the audience couldn't see me and so I suddenly appeared. Now!

I walked out and the dancers dispersed, leaving me facing the audience. People were screaming my name, excited to see me. I started the choreography steps as the first few bars of the song started to play. I just let myself go with the music, as I sang the first few lyrics of my hit song 'It's A Knife', getting the dancers to dance with me and the crowd to sing along as loud as they could.

The first song is over. People are clapping, jumping and screaming with euphoria. God, this is the best thing about making music; knowing what you're doing, making people get carried away by your music and having a good time while listening to it. It's the best thing that can happen to you.

The concert ends and I guess I need to say a few words to my fans. "Well I never thought a 17 year old like me could have done all this in just two years, I'm so proud of myself." The audience applauded and others chanted my name. "I want to thank each and every one of my fans, from all over the world, whether or not I'm here for this performance, just know that you will always have a place in my heart. Then I'd also like to thank all of the fabulous artists who have taken the time to fly to Japan and see me live. I really appreciate it and thank you so much. And lastly, to my older sister Akane for giving me all of her trust and time to be where I am, I love you so much sis. If it weren't for you I wouldn't be here." Akane clapped from backstage with tears in her eyes. "Anyway, thank you so much for coming here and just know that I really appreciate it. Good night Tokyo!" I said to finish my little speech.

This was the best night of my life

5 hours later...

Akane and I arrived at the hotel and lay onto the bed "I definetly need a shower" Akane said "Do you have any shampoos?"

"Yes, I left them in the bathroom. Have a good shower I guess"

Akane laughed and entered to the bathroom "Weirdo"

"Shut up!" I laughed and she finally entered.

I turned on the TV and turned on the news; I was in shock.

They were interviewing the celebrities who came to my performance! God, their opinion could affect my career, both good and bad.

I prayed they had good words.

"Well, we have here the iconic miss Britney Spears that was at Kiana's performance, what do you think about her?" 

Please Britney, please, your opinion is worth gold! "She's definetly so talented. I saw her dancing on that scenery and I felt her energy, I felt how her let herself go and she is the definition of music. If I had to define music as a person, I would choose her definetly." Yes!

"So you don't have bad words for Kiana, right?"

"Abdolutely not. I loved that performance. She is a 10 out of 10."

Thank God and thank Britney! Oh my god, I'm so proud og myself; the fact the the one and only Britney Spears said that her loved my performance was just magic.

"Thank you so mcuh Britney for you apportation, but let us know what Brandy thinks about Kiana. Brandy, what do you think about her and her performance?"

"The performance was just magic and I think that she has one of the best female vocal in pop music today, whether live, on recording, in sales, she kills it! And I don't have any bad words for her because, you know, talents like her you don't always see them and I'm very proud of her, honestly. I wish her the best in this world."

"So you don't have any nagging, have you?"

"Absolutely."

"Well Brandy, thank you so mcuh for your apportation."

Oh yes! My performance was perfect! They also interviewed the fans and my dancers and they shared the same opinion as Britney and Brandy, oh well, almost everyone.

The interviewer ran to the exit to interview another group: Tokio Hotel.

Okay, I was very nervous. The opinion of the members, especially Bill, would affect me greatly; for better or worse, since I admire them a lot. I thought they would also have good words for me. And they did. Except for one...

"Well, to finish this round of interviews with people about Kiana's performance on stage, we will close the questions with the German group Tokio Hotel!" Their opinion matters a lot! "We will start with Gustav; what do you think of Kiana?"

"I don't have words. She surprised me. She really is too good for someone like me to criticize her. I have no bad words." Oh my god! That's the cutest thing I've ever heard!

I don't really know why Tokio Hotel fans are underrating Gustav. Literally he's the cutest.

"And Georg, what do you think?"

"The same as Gustav, to be honest. I don't have words because that's the most incredible performance I've ever seen. I wish her luck." Please Tom, don't screw it up...

"Honestly, it's the best performance I've ever seen in my life. The music, the movements, everything was perfect, and she's also very pretty, which makes me fall in love with her and her music even more." Tom said. I don't think that Tom is a playboy, he's just smart; he knows how to get her, and he's also very handsome, but not as much as Bill obviously.

Now came the opinion that mattered most to me. I needed to know Bill's opinion, otherwise I swear I'll look for him myself and make him talk. "Well, the truth is that it wasn't anything special, she just danced and that's it, and the song, well, she sings well, but it's overrated. I recommend that she improve." I turned off the TV.

What?! 'Overrated'?! Does he even know the hours, days, I spent in the gym choreographing? Does he even know the sleepless nights I spent writing the lyrics to every damn song?

"Kiana..." Akane said as she came out of the bathroom freshly showered. "Auntie, I have very good news!"

"Which ones," I said in a soft, muffled, sad voice. What Bill said really got to me, damn.

"I got you a collaboration with Tokio Hotel! Your dream!"

"What?!" I said, stupefied "No! I can't! Did you hear what Bill said about me in the interview?!"

"Of course I did, duh, but their manager said that Gutsva, Georg and Tom have a very good opinion about you, so, why not!"

"Ugh..." I said as I lay down on the bed. "We'll talk tomorrow. I'm really tired." I said as I snuggled into the blankets. "Good night, Akane!"

Akane headed towards the exit to go to her room. "Good night. You better get some rest. I want you ready tomorrow at eight."

"Mhm." I said with my eyes closed.

Obviously I was going to accept the collaboration with Tokio Hotel, I'm not stupid. It was going to bring me a lot of sales.

I couldn't think for long, because as soon as I closed my eyes, I fell asleep.

***

can we talk about how physics depresses me? #ihatephhysics