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Zaveah's POV
"I truly never learned what the words "i miss you"were until i reached for my mom's hand and it wasn't there".
-Author Unknown.
Losing your mother at a young age effects you to a point only some may know. The pain varys through many different stages. It's a rollercoaster of emotions,denial,hurt and feeling like you lost the biggest piece of your heart and most of all the feeling of ANGER. It's a feeling you have when you feel as if you could of done something to change the outcome of the situation .
But as the Bible says God gives his strongest soldiers the toughest battles. That day i found out was the turning point in my life, when i found out it was like my world came crumbling down. I still to this day can't believe that Breast Cancer won the battle to one of the strongest women that i knew.
The Day I Found Out
I was at my aunt Van's and Uncle DD's house along with my baby brother Riley (who was 2 at the time)while my other little brother Fabian(who was 7) stayed with my mom and dad .My aunt and uncle has 4 children but i was more closer to my older cousin Monty she is a few months older than me but swears that i'm her baby cousin.
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Monty
Monty and I had school that morning, I woke up feeling great not knowing what was to come. My Aunt Van's cried in the car as she was dropping us off to school but none of question as to why she was crying so much.To this day I'm still not sure as to why i had such a great day at school, but as the school day came to an end my uncle DD came to pick us up from school .He was visibly very upset when we entered the car, when we got to the house he told us not to use our electronics which confused us because we hadn't done anything wrong . But being the curious child I was I still went on my phone anyways and saw that my uncle had a post a picture of my mom, me being curious I clicked on it.Just to see to words Rest in Peace I nearly broke down but i kept it together i couldn't believe it, that's when the feeling of anger ran through me. My first thought was, what kind of sick joke is this why would he post this? After trying to calm myself down i quickly called my father pretending as if i didn't know anything I asked him if everything was okay. Knowing my father he wouldn't tell me right away I asked him multiple times to be sure but he still played as if everything was okay.
That's when my emotions started to run wild. That's when my uncle walked into the house just as I hung up the phone and put it away.He told us all to get in his truck so he could carry us somewhere. We all went into the truck not questioning him,as were driving I realize we were heading towards my house.Monty turned around from the passenger seat and asked if i was okay. I tried to play it cool but my mind started to wonder and i was trying to think of all the possibilities as to why he would post that picture stating that.My mind drifted and i started to think what if she really did pass away but before any tears could form or even fall we pulled in front of my house. I quickly hop out of the truck and went speed walking towards my father to ask what was going on,because all my aunts and uncles even my grandmother were all sitting outside. Before i could have open my mouth my little brother Fabian ran up to me and told me... Mom is GONE they took her. (shout out to my little brother he is one of the strongest people i know he witness it all) I walk past him to walk towards the front door but my dad stood in front me I quickly pushed pass him and bolted towards the door. When i opened the door the first thing I spotted was her ventilator machine that she used was in the living room. That machine was very important because it helped her to breathe, that's when I immediately started shouting asking why she wasn't on her machine . No one answered me so i went toward her room to open it but i realized that the door was locked, when the realization hit me i started trying to break the door off the hinges to get in the room . That's when i started shouting these words over and over again...LET ME SEE MY MOTHER RIGHT NOW! When they finally got me away from the door to unlock the door I opened the door to only see the clothes she was wearing before they took her on the bed where she once slept peacefully. Finally accepting the fact that it actually happened I broke down into tears, that's when i ran outside and i ran and ran till i couldn't anymore. As i sat there crying and questioning God why he took her away from us,My aunt Sontia found me and started comforting me and telling me everything will be okay and told me that God does everything for a reason.
"When a mother dies, we lose a piece of who we are. We lose the person whose story provides the beginning of our own".
