Disclaimer : Please remember to re-read Chapter 4 before diving into this next chapter. You might discover something new...
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Saturday 15/09 : Wen's day
After this big wake-up call, he needed to sleep. He took his phone and set his alarm at 8.am sharp.
But he could not sleep and stared at the ceiling all night. When his alarm rang, his eyes were already open. He sat down on his bed and zoned out for a few minutes.
He thought about yesterday. Did he really told himself he was going out? Outside?
He looked at his computer, hoping to feel something, hoping to hear a call coming from the screen. But he did not want to play video games. This thought alone made him stand up.
He went into the bathroom and washed his face. He looked at his laundry bag; there were not a lot of clean clothes, but he managed to find a shirt and a nice pant. He dressed himself and put on his shoes.
Silence.
He heard his stomach growling. Again, and again. He went into the kitchen and made himself a cup of coffee. He searched his cupboard, looking for something to eat and found a cereal bar, the last one. He quickly ate it.
He saw himself in the mirror, all dressed up, clean face. A weird and intense feeling rushed through his entire body. He looked at the front door, then himself again. His legs started shaking, then both his hands. He had to sit down on the floor, breathing heavily.
He looked at his phone, it was 8.45 am. This relieved him, he was on time, he managed to fully get ready. His breathing became steadier.
He grabbed the door handle, rotated it and finally, he opened the door. He put one foot outside, then the other. He moved forward and stood in front of the door, before locking it.
He went down the stair, one by one, the air became more and more fresh. He went through the final door to the outside. The light slowly blinded him, the heat hugged his face. He inhaled deeply and marched toward the outside world.
As he stepped outside, he instantly felt overwhelmed. The sun started to burn, he couldn't see a thing, noises were everywhere. He thought about going back inside, to his comfort, his routine. But everything was wrong with his routine and deep down he knew that.
He walked, his legs felt heavy and light at the same time. He was stressed about what he was doing but he found comfort in the fact that he had a purpose. He couldn't even remember the last time he went outside, how the air felt, smelled, tasted like.
But the intense anxiety he felt around people was still there, pressing down on his chest and lungs. Still, he felt that he accomplished something on this day.
