Pretty Girl - Steven Conklin

10

The sun was beginning its descent, casting a golden hue over the Fisher house. I had spent most of the day trying to shake the feeling that something wasn't right, but as the day wore on, I realized I didn't need to solve everything today. Some things, like me and Belly and Conrad, couldn't be fixed just because I willed it.

I sat on the porch, my feet tucked under my knees, and watched the waves crash against the shore in the distance. It was peaceful here, even if everything else in my life felt chaotic. The one thing that was constant was the sound of the ocean, a reminder that things went on, whether or not we were ready.

The familiar sound of footsteps behind me snapped me out of my thoughts. I turned to see JJ walking toward me, a soft smile on his face. He looked like he had been out for a run, his hair tousled and damp from the heat, but he was still wearing that look I loved—the look that said, "I'm here, and I've got your back."

"Hey," I said, offering a small smile of my own.

"Hey yourself," he replied, sitting down next to me. "What's on your mind?"

I hesitated for a moment before speaking. "I don't know... everything just feels off, JJ. Belly's with Cam now, Conrad's barely around, and I... I'm just not sure where I fit anymore."

JJ raised an eyebrow. "That's a lot to take in. But you know what? You don't have to fit anywhere. Not right now. Sometimes, you just need to give yourself permission to not know where you belong."

I looked at him, considering his words. "I feel like I'm always the one holding things together. For Belly, for Mom, for everyone. But what about me, JJ? When do I get to fall apart? When do I get to be the one who's... broken?"

JJ's expression softened, and he nudged me gently with his elbow. "Dee, you've got to stop carrying everyone's weight. I get it, you're a fixer, but sometimes the only thing you can fix is yourself. And it's okay if you don't have all the answers right now."

I nodded slowly, his words sinking in deeper than I expected. It wasn't about being strong all the time. Maybe it was okay to let go of the façade for a moment.

"You've got a lot of weight on your shoulders, Dee," JJ continued, his tone gentle yet firm. "But I'm here, okay? Whenever you need a break, you just let me know."

I gave him a tired smile. "I don't know what I'd do without you, JJ."

"You don't have to," he said, his voice quiet. "You've got me, always."

We sat there in silence for a few moments, watching the sky turn from gold to pink. The peace of the moment didn't last long, though. The sound of the front door opening interrupted our quiet moment.

"Hey, is everything okay?" Belly asked, walking out onto the porch with a curious glance. She had a worried expression on her face, her eyes scanning both JJ and me. "You guys look... serious."

I gave her a reassuring smile. "Yeah, just talking."

She didn't look convinced, but she didn't press. Instead, she sat down next to me. "I haven't seen you two this quiet in a while."

JJ smirked. "We were just talking about how Dee's been trying to be the glue holding everything together. You know, fixing everything that's broken."

Belly's gaze softened. "I get that," she said, glancing at me. "But Dee, you don't always have to be the one to fix everything. I'm still here, you know? I might be... distracted with Cam and all, but you're my sister. I've got your back, always."

I looked at her, the weight of her words slowly sinking in. "Thanks, Belly," I said, my voice a little hoarse. "I think I needed to hear that."

She smiled at me, but it wasn't the usual playful grin she had whenever she made a joke. This was more serious, more genuine. "I mean it, Dee. You've always been the one who takes care of everyone else, but it's okay to lean on us too."

JJ stood up, stretching his arms above his head. "Well, I'm gonna grab a drink. I think we've had enough serious talk for one night, don't you think?"

Belly nodded, standing up as well. "I agree. We should do something fun."

"Yeah, let's make tonight about just... being. No drama, no pressure," I said, feeling like maybe I could actually take a break for once.

JJ gave a playful grin. "I can't promise no drama, but I'll try."

Belly rolled her eyes. "You're hopeless."

I chuckled, the sound of laughter easing some of the tension I hadn't even realized I was carrying.