In between the lines

Chapter 8- naked truths

Engfa's POV:

The space between us felt impossibly small as we pulled away from the kiss, our breaths shallow and uneven, tangled in the quiet rhythm we had created. It was as though the world around us had dissolved, leaving only the two of us suspended in time. Her skin, soft and warm against mine, sent a shiver of electricity through my body, but there was more than just the heat of her touch. There was an undercurrent of something heavier—an unspoken weight that seemed to settle between us, like a storm gathering, waiting to break.

"What I said last night... it wasn't a lie."

The words slipped from me, fragile and trembling, as if they were the truth I had been holding back for too long. I needed her to know that they weren't the incoherent ramblings of a drunken mind or the confusion of a night clouded by alcohol. When Charlotte repeated my words, it felt like a fog had cleared, like a veil had been lifted. The truth had always been there, buried deep beneath the walls I had built around myself, but it had escaped in the haze of the night—unfiltered, honest, and exposed.

A strange kind of relief washed over me, even though it was messy and painful. The truth had to come out. It wasn't clean or pretty, but it was necessary. We couldn't keep hiding behind facades. Maybe it would hurt—maybe it would shatter us—but we needed this. We needed to stop pretending, to stop running from what was real.

Charlotte stood there, her face unreadable, her eyes stormy with emotions I couldn't quite decipher. The tension in her gaze was unbearable, charged with everything unsaid between us, the weight of all the things I had been too afraid to voice. The silence stretched on, thick and heavy, as if it were filled with every fear, every doubt I had ever buried. I felt completely exposed—vulnerable in a way I had never been before. It was as though she could see past every wall I had ever built, beyond all the lies and insecurities that had kept me at a distance. In that moment, it felt like there was nothing left for me to hide.

But this wasn't a lie.

This wasn't just about last night. It was about everything that had led us here—the stolen glances, the quiet moments when our eyes lingered too long, the unspoken words that hung between us like fragile threads. I had never told her I loved her—not in the way she deserved. I had never given her the truth, the kind that would make her believe me. But that didn't mean it wasn't there. It was a fire inside of me, relentless and fierce, something I could no longer ignore.

I couldn't let Charlotte walk away from this moment thinking that she meant anything less than everything to me. I couldn't let her believe that what we shared, what I felt for her, was nothing. It had been buried beneath my fear and doubt, tangled in the mess of my own insecurities. But now, it was there, undeniable, right between us.

The silence between us deepened, suffocating in its weight. My heart raced, thudding in my chest as though it were trying to break free. I could hardly hear anything but the pounding in my ears. My breath was caught in my throat, a tight knot of anxiety and fear. I was terrified—terrified of what she might say, terrified of what she might think of me now. But I couldn't speak. The words were there, but I couldn't force them out.

Then, finally, she spoke.

"I hate you."

The words hit me like a physical blow, sharp and cruel. They shattered the fragile silence, cutting through me with a pain I wasn't prepared for. It was as if the ground beneath me had cracked open, swallowing me whole. I couldn't breathe, couldn't think. The hurt in her voice was palpable, raw, and it hit me harder than I expected. The anger, the betrayal, all of it tore through me like a storm I couldn't outrun.

But she wasn't done.

"I hate how much control you have over me," she continued, her voice trembling, each word dripping with the bitterness of feeling trapped, betrayed. "I hate how you make me feel like I'm nothing—like I don't matter. And just when I think I'm strong enough to walk away, you pull me back in. You give me a glimpse of something real, just enough to keep me hanging on. I hate how much I care about you, even when I know I shouldn't."