Till Death Do Us Part

Chapter 16: Decisions and Twist Ties

The pair sat on the sofa, scribbling down the pros and cons of each world onto their respective pieces of paper. What began as a rainy morning transitioned into a sticky, humid late afternoon. The sky was dull, a shade so gray it hid the sun completely from view. Raven stared idly out the window, lost in the blankness of the day.

These days were her favorite, the gray sky allowed for possibilities. They provided a blank slate, a tabula rasa—the opportunity for change. Raven needed change. Ever since being transported to this "other world," Raven realized how lucky she was to be released from the powers that kept her chained to her emotions. The change was shaky at first but, over time, she had learned to allow herself a chance to feel her emotions rather than suppress them.

"I put missing the team as a con for this world, too," Beast Boy said, peaking at Raven's sheet of loose leaf. His voice snapped Raven from her thoughts.

Quickly, she clutched the paper to her chest and shook her head. "You're not supposed to look. Remember?"

"I was just curious."

"We'll exchange lists when we're done. These need to be our lists, we can't be swayed by each other's answers." 

Fine." Beast Boy turned toward the end table, removing the temptation to sneak another look at Raven's list. Beast Boy rubbed his temples, frustrated. Every time he put a point down for one world, throwing that one in the lead, the other world would somehow catch up. No matter what he did, his lists remained tied. He liked it here.

The pressure being a superhero brought was nonexistent, all he had to worry about was keeping both himself and Raven happy. But would he ever be truly happy without his powers? He shook his head. That was something he was not sure about. Tomorrow, he would still be happy and the next day. What about six months from now or a few years down the road, would he still be happy without them then?

Beast Boy looked at Raven from the corner of his eye, he felt his heart beat faster. Raven made him happy, she made him feel com Raven made him happy, she made him feel completely content with living in a world with no powers. He looked away, wishing he did not have to make the decision.

"Rae, I don't know. Can we compare lists now? I can't do this on my own."

She scooted closer to him, putting a hand on his leg. "You don't have to do this on your own. We're together, Gar. I promise."

The loyalty Beast Boy heard in Raven's voice touched him deeply. He smiled and put a hand on hers. "No matter the decision, we will be together." He kissed Raven's jaw, his cool lips upon her warm skin sent shivers down her spine.

"Look at me." Beast Boy took Raven's chin in his hand and turned her head to face his. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"We're going to be okay."

"Okay," Raven said, nodding. Beast Boy rested his head against her shoulder, taking in the sweet smell of her hair. He closed his eyes, longing to lose his thoughts to her perfumed locks.

"Like a summer rainstorm on the beach." He whispered, so close to his fictitious beach he could almost hear the waves lapping the shore. Raven placed her head on Beast Boy's. Her eyes were fixated on the wall, but her gaze extended beyond the surface, tugged into the past.

Raven was pulled by her memories into a time when she was ruled by her emotions. How desperately she tried to keep herself balanced, it was an uphill battle she had to fight each day. Sometimes she no longer wanted to fight, but something inside her told Raven it would be a waste to give up.

"Remember before we came here? I had so much control, I was so focused," Raven said. She brushed her hair back behind one ear and sighed. "But I was also pretty lonely. It's weird. No matter how hard I tried, the one emotion that kept coming back to me over and over was, well, sadness."