GUILTY (Mxm)

15

Note: Emotional abuse, toxic relationships, and internal conflict can be triggering. If you or someone you know is experiencing abuse, please seek help.

Declan, do you remember when I first saw you in that bar? I swear I fell in love with you, but I didn't want to approach you. My friends would call me a fag for loving a man.

But to my luck, they placed a bet - if I made you fall in love with me, I would win money. Even though I did it for the bet, I really wanted to know you, and indeed I did.

Later, when our love was still fine, I saw how you loved me, spoiled me with gifts, care, and how you supported me. It was beautiful, and I wanted to hold onto it.

But I would be a fag to my friends. They would shun me out. I didn't want it, so I started being bad to you, letting my friends insult you, treat you like nothing, while I just looked and did nothing.

But it hurt me, and I cared. I was a coward, Declan, but I cared.

Here's the continuation of Jerome's confession:

"That time when we shot Lala's shoulder...I still remember how disappointed you looked at me, how repelled you looked. And I couldn't stand it, because I knew I had lost you.

"Later, you found me in my hiding spot, and you imprisoned me yourself. When I was in that cell, I regretted all the times I treated you like nothing because of my useless friends. I regretted ever breaking your heart.

"I swore that when you forgave me, I would never let you go again. But when I looked at how badly I treated you...I knew you would leave me. That thought really tortured me, making me like this...the crazy partner.

"I couldn't bear the thought of losing you, Declan. I couldn't bear the thought of you moving on, finding someone else. I had to keep you, no matter what.

"My friends, they don't matter anymore. You're all that matters. And I'll do whatever it takes to keep you mine."

Jerome's voice cracked, his eyes welling up with tears.

"I know I've hurt you, Declan. I know I've broken your trust. But please, forgive me ."

Jerome's grip on Declan's bound hands tightened.

"I know it sounds twisted, Declan, but that bet changed my life. I never thought I'd fall deeply in love with you. But as we spent more time together, I realized I couldn't imagine living without you.

"But my friends...they wouldn't understand. They'd mock me, call me a fag, and disown me. I was trapped between my love for you and my fear of rejection.

"So, I started to push you away. I let my friends disrespect you, and I did nothing. It killed me inside, but I thought it was the only way to keep my secret safe.

"But the more I hurt you, the more I realized I couldn't lose you. You were my everything, Declan. Your love, your care, your support...it was all I ever wanted.

"And now, I'll do anything to keep you. Anything."

Jerome's voice cracked as he spoke, his eyes pleading for understanding.

"Declan, I know I've messed up. I know I've hurt you. But please, don't leave me. I'll do whatever it takes to make it right."

Jerome's grip on Declan's bound hands tightened.

"I love you, Declan. More than anything."

"I promise, Declan. I'll never let you go again."

Here's the continuation:

Declan's eyes locked onto Jerome's, filled with a deep sorrow. He pleaded silently, his gaze begging for release. Jerome's grip on the ropes hesitated, then slowly loosened.

As the ropes fell away, Declan's hands flew around Jerome, pulling him into a desperate embrace. Jerome stiffened, startled, before melting into the hug.

"Jerome, my love," Declan whispered, his voice cracking. "What have you done to us?"

Jerome's face buried in Declan's shoulder, his body shuddering. "I'm sorry, Declan. I'm so sorry."

Declan's hold tightened, his tears mingling with Jerome's. "Why, Jerome? Why did you push me away?"

Jerome's voice was barely audible. "Fear...fear of losing you. Fear of being rejected."

Declan's heart broke anew. "You never had to fear losing me, Jerome. You only had to love me."

Jerome's body convulsed, his sobs ripping through the silence.

Declan's lips brushed against Jerome's ear. "You destroyed us, Jerome. You destroyed our love."

Jerome's whisper was laced with agony. "I know...I know. Forgive me, Declan."

Declan's grip faltered, his arms trembling. "I forgive you, Jerome. But can we ever go back?"

Jerome's face lifted, his eyes red-rimmed. "Can we try?"

Declan's expression twisted in anguish. "I don't know, Jerome. I don't know if we can ever be whole again. Except you accept therapy."

"Yes I will go this time , I will do it for us, Declan."
Their bodies swayed, entwined in a fragile, broken dance.

Note: Emotional abuse, toxic relationships, and internal conflict can be triggering. If you or someone you know is experiencing abuse, please seek help.