Can I Still Be A Star?

Better Out Than Kept In

𝗔 𝗙𝗲𝘄 𝗪𝗲𝗲𝗸𝘀 𝗘𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗿...

"Alright everyone, I think it's best if we wrap up practice here. As always, you all did fantastic work. I wouldn't expect anything less from my troupe, of course."

"Aw, already? I was having so much fun! Especially when Robo-nene went Zip then Zoom!"

Emu tried her best to imitate Robo-nene's earlier movements, eliciting a chuckle from Rui.

"I agree with Rui, it's getting pretty late and my parents would probably worry if I was home late..."

Tsukasa stood a bit farther from the group, which was pretty unusual. Throughout practice, he seemed distant. It hadn't gone unnoticed either.

"Huh? I thought you're parents didn't come home until later? Seems that our earlier discussion was right. Something's definitely up."

"Well, yeah, but-! Wait, what do you mean 'Something's definitely up?' Have you guys been talking about me behind my back?"

"Not in a bad way, Tsukasa-kun! We've just been...worried about you."

Emu stepped up before Nene could respond. Nene and Emu glanced at Rui, then back at each other. It was only normal that they would be worried about him. He was acting quite strange.

Tsukasa, on the other hand, couldn't believe it. He was supposed to be able to trust his troupe. Sure, he had seen their earlier conversation in the group chat. It was clear that they had been discussing this for a while. It felt like...they had betrayed him.

No. He had betrayed 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺. Why didn't he just admit the truth? Hiding his pregnancy was a betrayal to his troupe. And he thought they were in the wrong? He didn't deserve to be their friend, their troupe leader, their-

"Let's just change and head home. I think that'd be best for all of us, wouldn't you agree?"

"R-right..."

Tsukasa was relieved that Rui had stepped in and said something. He was about to be consumed by his thoughts. Swallowed up with no way of getting to him. With a few concerned glances, the girls headed to the dressing room while the boys headed to their separate one.

_

As soon as they reached the room, Rui pulled Tsukasa in for a kiss, one short and simple. Nothing had to be said because it was a normal occurrence. He always kissed Tsukasa after a performance or when rehearsal ended but, right now, it just felt...awkward. Wrong. Disgusting even.

"Your house is empty right now, isn't it? I was wondering if I could come over and we could hang out? Watch a movie, study, maybe even-"

"No! I-I mean...I'm not in the mood..."

Tsukasa knew what he was getting at. He couldn't bare to say yes. Despite how much he wanted it. Despite how much his body craved it. He wanted to feel that closeness again. Feel Rui's touch in all the right places. Feel his breath against his neck. He really was a whore, wasn't he?

"What's with you lately? You haven't been 'in the mood' for months. Did I do something wrong? Was I too rough last time?"

"It's nothing like that! Um...I just think we do it too often?"

Rui raised and eyebrow, skeptical at Tsukasa's words. Turns out, he was a terrible liar, but he didn't need someone to tell him that. Tsukasa knew it as soon as the words left his mouth.

He flinched as Rui cupped his face. Darn it! Why did everything he do turn Tsukasa on? Well, maybe that's not the right word. More like, make him fall deeper in love?