The Razed City

Caleb

"I love you," Ave tells Logan.

He snorts. "You love chocolate. It's not the same thing."

Grinning at him, she sticks her spoon into the mousse he made with Marta. "Okay, I love you and I love the chocolate."

"I like chocolate," Kiko says distractedly. She flips a page in her book as she takes another bite.

"How's your shoulder?" Logan asks.

"Fine." Her cup of mousse is empty, so she slides her spoon into Eric's without looking up from her book. He smacks her hand away.

"Are you still taking the meds from Doctor Smith?"

"Nope. Did you know that most gunshot wounds like mine take three to six months to heal? Isn't that weird? Maybe mine was faster because there was no bone trauma. I mean, I'm not going to win a boxing championship anytime soon but I got to twenty six push ups this morning before Eric made me stop. Is there more chocolate?"

I hand her my cup. "I'm not hungry."

"You're always hungry." Ave's eyes latch onto me warily.

"Can we leave?" I ask.

They all look at me, except Eric, who takes another bite of his mousse.

"Now?" Logan asks.

"Soon," I say. "Kiko-chan is better, right? We don't need to stay."

"Yes, but..."

Ave and Logan exchange glances, doing that thing where they read each other's mind.

"I guess we have to," Ave says. "It's just..."

"We've been talking about places we could go," Logan continues. "And there aren't a lot of great options. Compass is probably still looking for us."

"We can't stay here," Eric says. He doesn't look at me, but I know he's thinking about the panic attack. "What if we, I dunno, got our own apartment-"

"And do what?" Ave asks. "Go to school?"

"Yeah, sure." He grins. "Rent books at the library. Go out to dinner. Get jobs."

"Hmm." I hold my breath while Logan thinks. Our own apartment- I can't wrap my head around it. Only, I can, and I want to. We could do anything, now that we're not pawns of Compass. Anything. The whole world is behind a door that we've already opened.

"The problem, though..." Logan pauses, looking at all of us. Making sure we're paying attention. "The other problem is that it's been over a month since we left Compass."

"So?" I ask. The more time away from, them the better, right?

"The meds," Logan explains. "The ones Compass gave us to help with our disabilities."

Oh, right. The long needles, the liquid that felt like peanut butter moving through my veins. But thinking about a little flat, with just the five of us...

"I think we can handle it."

They're all looking at me again, shaking their heads. Ave drums her foot against the floor.

"We can't. I can't."

"ADHD doesn't bother you," I point out. "It bothers Logan."

Logan twitches and turns to Ave. "It does, I'm sorry. I can't help-"

She cuts him off. "I know, and it's fine. You didn't ask for OCD. But-"

"Most people grow out of it," Kiko says. "ADHD. And-" she looks at Eric- "dyslexia. Or the effects lessen, at least."