oneshots for zerobaseone!! includes: fluff, angst, all sfw!! member x reader. proper spelling & grammar. [this is pure fiction and does not represent the real members or their personalities] 💗
╔══════════════════╗ ZHANG HAO ✎ xi. my heart returns ╚══════════════════╝
a/n. whisper of the heart au :) tiánxīn = sweetheart
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The night air nipped at your cheeks as thoughts swirled in your head. Hundreds of worries, feelings, and uncertainties followed you wherever you went, and all you could wish was to be back in high school when everything felt a bit easier. Back with Hao to occupy all your thoughts and in turn take your mind off of everything.
Sometimes you wondered if waiting was really worth it. You were doing your best to pursue your dreams, do well in your final year of university, and throw yourself and your work at different publishers, hoping that one liked you enough to give you a chance. But you felt like a constant failure in comparison to your boyfriend. You'd always thought opportunities were more beneficial than school. Hao only seemed to prove that to you.
He was working in Italy, getting valuable skills from the masters. You were still stuck in your hometown, going to the same university everyone else in your family had gone to, trapped in the same system. You wanted to get out, prove yourself, do something meaningful with your life. But did you even have the talent to? Were you even worth it?
On nights where your thoughts just wouldn't leave you alone, you grabbed a handful of Hao's letters and walked up the hill back to the spot where you used to watch the sunrise with him. You missed him more than anything. Without his presence, you felt lost. There was no one to ground you, no one to reassure you, no one to believe in your flimsy dreams.
You hadn't received a new letter in a while, and you were starting to wonder if it was a post issue, or if Hao was too busy to write. You hoped you would get one soon. It was the start of Winter already, and a breeze blew past you, causing a chill to run up your spine. You hugged Hao's old jacket closer on your body. It must be even colder in Italy...
You slid one of the old letters out from its envelope. You were always careful to keep everything intact. From the colourful wax seals to the elegantly written address, to the coarse texture of the fancy paper, everything about it was precious to you. Hao was always meticulous, and his presence could be felt from every detail of the card.
Tiánxīn, how are things back at home?
Lonely.
How is your writing? Did you finish the last 3 chapters you were struggling to write?
I finished the final draft last Saturday. Are you proud of me?
I'm doing well here, although I never stop missing you.
At least one feeling is mutual.
It's the beginning of Spring as I write this, and the flowers are starting to bloom. Every pink bud reminds me of you.
How are you always so romantic, Zhang Hao?
I taught some kids how to hold a violin properly the other day— one of them almost dropped it. I swear my life flashed before my eyes. If they had broken it, I could've gotten kicked out. They don't know that they're handling a piece of wood worth thousands of dollars. As much as it scared me in the moment, spending time with the kids cheered me up. Childhood innocence is an endearing thing, don't you think?
It is. Is it bad that I wished you had gotten kicked out just so I could see you sooner? I want you to tell me everything about Italy with your own voice.
I'm starting to find beauty in things that used to annoy me. It's a strange feeling, but I think I could get used to it. The flowers used to only make me sneeze, but now they're a gentle reminder of who I'm living every day for. Children used to get on my nerves, but now I can only think of your baby pictures. I keep working hard every day hoping that I'll get a break to come visit soon. I've been saving up for tickets. Hopefully before Winter, I'll be back in your arms.
It's Winter now... I miss your arms around me.
Ever yours,
Hao
You could only sigh and blink back the tears that had formed on your waterline. Why did he make you miss him so much? You sniffed, from the emotions and from the cold. It was getting even later in the night, and while you didn't want to leave your special spot, you also needed sleep.
When you got back to your cheap apartment, you sprayed some of Hao's perfume on your pillow and changed into pyjamas. It was funny how much time went into hunting for the exact fragrance he wore; but you had been thankful for it every single day since you bought it. Any way you could to bring traces of him back to your home was worth it. You fell asleep hugging the pillow tightly and hoping that he would grace you in your dreams.
♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.
A soft puff of air hit your nose making you scrunch it up. It woke you out of your slumber, but not enough to open your eyes yet. You were in a confused bleary state trying to figure out where it came from. You definitely didn't leave the fan on in the middle of Winter, so why...?
"Tiánxīn, wake up."
You blinked your eyes open slowly, furrowing your eyebrows as the view came into focus. Light from the morning sun shone through the window, cascading down until it hit the side of a face. Hao's face.
"Am I still dreaming?" You whispered. A lump formed in your throat at the thought that you were— you must be. How could he be right in front of you? He was still far away in Italy.
He shook his head, a smile splayed on his lips. He moved closer, his weight dipping down on the bed. You could only stare, memorising everything about him. His eyelashes fluttered as his gaze dropped to your hand and he reached to hold it. His hands were warm and the skin of his palm was soft, although his fingertips were roughened by calluses after years of playing strings. He cupped your cheek with his other hand, brushing his thumb against your skin.
"I missed you. I'm sorry it took so long for me to come visit." He frowned slightly as he saw tears start to build in your eyes. You squeezed his hand, as if still deciphering whether he was actually real. It had truly been years since he had first gone for his apprenticeship and then got accepted full time to make violins and teach. Although you had communicated through letters, it could never compare to being with him like this.
"It's okay." You tried to steady your voice, force the lump in your throat down, blink back the tears. But you couldn't with him right there.
"Don't cry." He wiped your tears carefully, his touch soft as always.
"Kiss me. Please?"
And he obliged. He would always do anything within his power to see you happy. If you told him one day to fly to the moon and bring you back a piece of it, he was sure he would find a way, just to see you smile. The feeling of kissing him again was indescribable. You'd forgotten how it felt to be kissed by his soft lips, how they melded with yours like a dream. As if you two were meant to be.
You knew you always were. Your love story, although it sometimes felt tragic, was like something out of a fairytale. You would never forget the lengths Hao went just to get your attention. How ambitious, determined, and caring he was. He was your constant motivation to keep striving to be better.
It was hard to live for your dream while being so far apart from him. Part of you knew that he would have to go back. Maybe in a month, maybe in only a week. Maybe sooner than that. Your heart would break once again saying goodbye to him.
But, for now, as he kissed you in the morning sunlight on your bed, you felt your heart healing from his touch. The long years away from him were a small price to pay for moments as precious as these.
