chapter 1

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         I grew up with seven siblings, one
Mom and no dad... except for his mother's
                               boyfriend.
                       He was there alot....
I hated them though.... he wasn't my father.
My father was the bestest man in the whole
  world!!! But that man.... that's not my dad
I heard things... They'd always talked in my
     ear... it was like they were right there...
               Breathing down my neck...
          Mama would always be up early.
                  I still lived with mama....
    The others left once they were able to...
      She's always sad she never sees them,
                 unless it's the holidays..
        I looked down stairs and saw her,
     She bought me chicken and I smiled
     running down. I hugged her and she
       grinned widely and kiss my cheek.
"Baby! You're awake! Come on mama got
                   some chicken for you!"
       I smiled as I ate once give a plate.
She left saying she had to meet up with her
                              Boyfriend.

                "Okay mama.... be safe!"
I said worried, she looked nice but too nice
         Some punk might try something...
I just ended up sighing... I had to hurry and
     Catch my flight back to New Mexico...
                         -'it's poisoned'-
     I drop my piece of chicken and freeze.
      -'she doesn't love you... no one does'-
                  -'you're being watched'-
                        -'they're outside'-
I grabbed my head and jolted up shaking
                               my head.
   I turned to the window and saw a man
   just standing there... I blink and he just
                           disappeared.
                             "St-STOP!"
I begged, after awhile of begging and um..
       being brave totally not crying, they
                               stopped.
       I got up and looked at the chicken...
  I tried to take another bite but hesitated..
          I'm scared... so I let it stay there.

  "I'm not that hungry.... I need to get to my
                                flight..."
             I said as I walked up stairs.
I open up my suitcase and stuff my clothes
                                 inside.
   I grabbed my coat since it was snowing
                                  hard.
  I headed out, locking he door and taking
                         my key with me.
         I grab my phone and got an Uber.
                        I then just waited...

The soft snow feels nice and nostalgic on
                               my feet.
I smile and nuzzle more into my scarf that
ma had knitted for me when I was 11... it
   was always really big and still is... but it
              was big in a nice cozy way.
       It always smelt like her, like home...
   The Uber gets her and I walk up, asking
                    "Are you for Jeremy?"

                        "Yes, get in kid!"
           He said unlocking the doors.
                 I walk in and he asked.
"How old are ya kid? Going to pick up ya
                                 mom?"

  "No... I'm leaving back to New Mexico... I
    work there... I was just visiting my ma."
                    I said looking at him.

                "Oh! First job huh? Cool!"

       "NO, this is my second job... I'm 26"

                    The car went silent.
"My bad dude... you look 16 or 18!... so um..
                      What do you do?"
     He asked trying to change the subject.

          "Oh! I kill people professionally!"
                           I said smiling.
He froze and the rest of the ride was silent.
    I didn't mind because then I could just
                                Listen
                            to my music.

                    -'he's gonna kill you'-
                       -'you need to run'-
                     I freeze and breathe.
  I shook my head and prayed it won't come
                                   back.

                       "Sir we're here..."

                                 "Huh?"
          I said adjusting my hearing aid.
                            "Oh thanks!"
     I got out and left, heading to my gate.
   I didn't bored till 20 minutes but I don't
                          mind standing.
         The gates open and we're let on.

   I slowly get on and show them my ticket
                     that I bought online.
       I boreded and sat down in my seat.
            I was thankfully sitting alone.
Not many people leave Boston now since
           It's fall and not near Christmas.
             Still it was snowing like fuck...
       Now I just had to wait till I landed.
      I can't wait to see Ms. Pauling again!

               We land and I hopped off.
         I see  heavy holding a sign saying
  Da scoot, it was crossed off and under it
                            was ze Scout.
     I wave him down and run up to him.
           "HEY HEAVY! how ya been?!"
He grabbed me and headed to a truck Ms.
       Pauling let him use to pick me up.
        I get in and he smiles seeing me.

                        "How is scout?"

"Great! Ma has been doing great too! I can't
           wait to see her on Christmas!"

   "Good! Scout seems happy! Ms Pauling
     will be glad! She with administrator."
                He said smiling warmly.

   "Huh?... Pauling won't be meeting us?..."

         "Not like normal, she has work!"
      He saw how sad I was and  handed
                          me chocolate.

                            I grabbed it.
                      "Thanks heavs..."
        It tasted weird but kind of good.
                              It's bad....

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