The Secret (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 3 (New Thoughts)

Sorry for the short chapters, I have alot of essay's to write. I do have a life, EVEN if its a crummy one. ok well, Byesies!! ----> Picture of Honey on da side. Hyuna Kim is pretty right? <3

Her friends looked at me curiously. I returned a nervous smile and bit my lip. The rest of the group went on talking about other things and I just looked at the floor. I felt hands on my shoulders and jumped. I turned around and nearly kissed the guy from yesterday. He stared into my eyes and bit his lip. “You bitch; I’m going to destroy you.” He grabbed my collar and pulled my face closer to his. Honey and some of her friends grabbed his arms, shoved him, and told him to leave. He ignored them and told me he was going to kill me. Then he left without a second glance and joined some guys at the corner lunch table. My lip quivered. I didn’t want to cry right now, I bit my lip and tried to blink back my tears. I couldn’t stay here right now, I needed to cut, and I needed to get out of here. I couldn’t stay here. I ran out of the cafeteria onto the steps outside. I sat there and scratched my wrist. “Hey, new kid!” I didn’t know who was calling me and I didn’t want to. The guy from earlier sat beside me. “My name’sLogan.” He reached out his hand to shake my hand. I couldn’t shake, he’d see my scars. I just shook my head no at him. He looked at me worriedly. “Look, I’m sorry for being such a jerk in there. I was just mad because, you’re very cute and you were ignoring me.” I looked at this guy in wonder. Did he just tell me I was cute? Wasn’t he a guy? Did that mean he was gay? I didn’t ask any of my questions, I was too intimidated. I had finally worked up the courage to ask him if he was gay and just as I was about to, he leaned over grabbed my cheeks softly in his hands and kissed me. It was a very hot and passionate kiss filled with a lot of need and hunger. After the kiss ended, I looked at him confusingly. Why had he kissed me? Why did I like it? I didn’t have time to ask my questions or come up with any answers. I felt Honey’s arm loop through mine as she tried to pull me away. I didn’t fight her, I just followed.

                                    Later on that night…

I sat on my bed and looked over briefly at Honey. She was sleeping against me. I pulled my knees up to my chest and thought about the day. That guy Logan had kissed me and I had loved very second of the kiss. As soon as Honey and I had gotten to my room, I’d grabbed her and pushed her against the wall and kissed her, pretending she was Logan. It was wrong on so many levels, but I didn’t care. I wanted to know what it was like to be normal, being gay, wouldn’t help me right now. I’d gotten enough harassment for a lifetime. I sighed softly and dreamed about Logan and I kissing at my locker. I imagined him pinning me against my locker and kissing me with the same passion and lust from today. I imagined kissing him against my wall, like I had done to Honey. Before those thoughts fully registered in my head, I gave my head a shake to clear it. I wasn’t gay, I wasn’t bisexual. I was straight, dear God, please tell me I was straight. I chastised myself for thinking what I had. I thought about what I would do at school tomorrow and how I would face him. I thought of many ways and none of them seemed right. ‘I love you Logan’ that was the last thought that left my head. I fell into a deep slumber.