Since Day One - Max Verstappen X Male Reader

Chapter 13

Pacing around the streets of Hungary I'm practically cursing Max for having this hold over me. I can only think about how easy my life would be right now if I didn't get involved with him and what my life could have been if I didn't join Sauber. My friends had always told me not to get in a tangle with my feelings about a man yet here we are that ship had sailed and sank the second I arrived in the paddock. 

I think of all the places he would go but trying to get in the mindset of Max Verstappen isn't easily done. He's a very…. well let's say a peculiar person. 

I decided to head to the place Lando took me to previously as he described it as the “go to place to be alone” although if it's thto"go to place” surely that means everyone goes there but when I tried explaining it to Lando he looked very confused. Eventually I get to the spot and I can see a dark figure looking out to the city below as the sun begins to set casting a slight darkness over the tree shrouded spot. 

As I get closer the dim street lights make it possible to work out that it is indeed Max. 

I take a seat next to him letting out a sigh, whilst opening a can of red bull, placing a spare one on the bench and pushing it towards Max. 

“Here” I say, pushing it closer. 

He picks it up and takes a sip after opening it, he lets out a slight sigh and places it down. 

“So what brings you up here?” I ask after a brief interlude of silence. 

“I didn't want to spoil your celebration” 

“You got a podium as well Max it's your celebration as well” I add in a reasoning manner. 

“Y/N I ruin everything I do for you and you don't deserve everything I have done to you. I just ruin everything your F1 career has been so stressful because of me”

“No Max it's not because of you my F1 carer has been stressful I joined a team that had a shit year last year and suddenly found performance which meant I had to prove myself even more, I slept with a Mercedes junior driver, signed with another junior team despite me being a grand prix winner my career is looking pretty bleak and I have one person to blame and that's myself.” 

“You slept with Kimi” 

“How do you know it was Kimi I could have slept with Mick or Fred” 

“Trust me Kimi followed you around like a golden retirement it was pretty obvious” 

“Anyway you've got a girlfriend so no need to judge me” 

“I had a girlfriend” 

“What do you mean?” I ask. 

“We split up before you ask why I will just tell you. We didn't get on and I realised that she wasn't the one that I wanted to spend my life with.”

“I'm sorry” I say in the most apoplectic tone I can muster up. 

“Why it's not as if it was your fault I jumped into a premature relationship”  Max’s voice was soft but firm, as if the weight of what he was saying was finally settling in. 

The cool evening air, mixed with the hum of distant city sounds, hung around us as I processed his words. I shifted, feeling the awkwardness creep in. 

“I guess we’re both a bit of a mess then, huh?” I said, breaking the silence, trying to make light of the conversation, but deep down, the rawness of it all still tugged at me. I wasn’t sure if I was sad, frustrated, or just tired of trying to make sense of everything that me and Max have been through.