Aries: dear karma, I have a lot of people you missed.
Taurus: all my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips. (If you live in the UK, then crisps)
Gemini, don't look at yourself as an ugly person, look at yourself as a beautiful monkey.
Cancer: after Tuesday, even the calendar goes W-T-F
Leo: raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip is the reason I have trust issues
Virgo: follow your heart but take your brain with you.
Libra: I love you with all my butt.
Scorpio: 8 planets, 204 countries, 809 islands, 6,000,000,000+ people and I'm still single
Sagittarius: I'm not lazy, I'm in energy saving mode.
Capricorn: I need a six month vacation, twice a year.
Aquarius: some people just need a high five........in the face..........with s chair.
Pisces: I'll be back in five minutes. If not, read this message again.
YOU ARE READING
zodiac signs
Randomthe last time i updated this thing for real was in 2015, so i highly advise against reading this. even so, i will never cease to be astonished at the sheer number of individuals who have willingly read and loved this book over the course of the past...