Tides of deception ✺ Outlander/Stephen Bonnet Fanfic

♤44. Goodbye

The carriage jolted forward, and Stephen kept his gaze firmly fixed on Maria, who stood just beyond the estate's gates, watching him with teary eyes. Her hand was pressed gently to her belly, her other hand lifted to wave, blowing kisses into the cool morning air. The sight of her standing there, as delicate as a flower yet resilient enough to root herself in his heart, made Stephen's chest tighten. He clenched his jaw, willing himself to remember why he had to leave, even as she grew smaller in the distance, each step of the carriage taking him further from the life he wanted to protect.

Maria waved until the dust began to settle, her lips trembling as she forced a smile, trying to keep her courage for him. Stephen's hand twitched on his knee, his fingers curling into a fist, resisting the urge to shout for the carriage to stop, to run back to her and assure her of everything he couldn't say. His heart pounded, aching to be beside her, to feel the warmth of her body against his and to rest his hand over hers, steadying it as she rubbed her belly-a reminder of the life they had created, a life he would have to leave for the sake of their future.

As the estate disappeared behind him, Stephen closed his eyes briefly, forcing himself to think of what awaited him on the sea, the mission, and the promise of wealth he could return with. It was for her, for their child. He'd come back to her, no matter what it took.

✺

Meanwhile, back at the ship, Declan unfolded a letter in his hands, the faint, lingering scent of roses and lavender catching his attention. He glanced around to ensure he was alone before reading Julie's words, each line echoing with her gentle spirit, her words bringing her presence closer, even across the vast space that separated them.

"Declan, I finally went to the market today and bought roses-vibrant and bright, though they'll never compare to what I feel for your safe return. I'll wait for you. And in the meantime, I'll think of you whenever I smell their perfume. Come back safely, for I'm holding onto that promise. Yours, Julie."

His chest stirred with an emotion he rarely let himself acknowledge. He could almost see her there, arranging those roses in a simple vase, looking out the window with a quiet hope, wondering where he was on his journey. The edges of his lips turned upward in a rare, soft smile as he refolded the letter, slipping it carefully into his coat. The scent lingered, and for a brief moment, he could almost imagine her beside him, close enough to touch.

Just then, Justin's footsteps echoed down the corridor. Declan slipped the letter into his coat as Justin's gaze fell on him, his eyes sharp, a smirk spreading across his face as he caught a glimpse of Declan's expression.

"Julie?" Justin asked, his grin widening.

Declan gave him a sharp look, though his lips betrayed a half-smile of his own. "Mind your business," he growled, though the warmth in his tone took the edge off his words.

Stephen, nearby, watched the exchange with mild curiosity but kept his thoughts to himself, his mind still lingering on Maria. Declan cleared his throat, folding his hands behind his back with his usual composed demeanor.

"I'll have something to discuss with you during our journey, Captain," Declan said, nodding at Stephen. His voice had regained its firm tone, though the hint of satisfaction lingered in his gaze.

Stephen returned the nod, just as Justin's laughter echoed down the deck, the sound carrying through the air and mingling with the chatter of the crew.

Declan shot a warning glare at Justin, who, with a final chuckle, took the hint and made his way down the deck, giving the men instructions as they hauled barrels and crates aboard. Above, the sails were unfurled, their crisp white canvas catching the morning breeze, filling as the crew prepared for departure. The rhythmic sound of ropes tightening and the calls of the sailors blended into a song of anticipation, the ship gradually coming alive under their hands.

Stephen took a last, deep breath, turning his focus fully toward the open sea that lay before them. But, even as he readied himself for the journey ahead, he couldn't shake the image of Maria standing alone at the gate, and his fingers drifted almost unconsciously to his own coat, resting on the place where her letter lay against his chest.

✺

Maria sat curled up in her bedroom, a place that once felt warm and secure, but now seemed cold and hollow. Her emotions swelled, stronger than the waves Stephen would be facing out at sea. She pressed a trembling hand over her heart, trying to steady the storm of feelings that coursed through her. But the tears kept coming, unstoppable, driven by a mix of sorrow and raw, unfiltered emotion that seemed beyond her control. She hated that her body-already changing with new life-could betray her in this way, amplifying every ache she felt in Stephen's absence.

Her fingers traced the delicate curves of her ring, the one Stephen had chosen with such care. Two hearts, intertwined and unbreakable, now felt like a promise stretched too thin. She tried to take comfort in the symbol, imagining his fingers placing it on hers, his quiet words of love whispered only for her. But even those memories couldn't fill the empty space left by his departure.

A soft knock at her door broke her reverie. Maria tried to pull herself together, wiping her eyes quickly as the chambermaid's concerned voice called from the other side.

"Are you alright, Miss?" the maid asked, her voice hesitant but full of empathy.

Maria took a deep breath, struggling to keep her voice steady. "Not really," she admitted, her voice cracking. Heartbroken didn't even begin to describe it.

There was a moment of silence, then the maid offered, "Shall I bring you some tea?"

Maria nodded, unable to find words, her throat tight with grief. She watched as the maid's expression softened with a look of pity, one that somehow made her feel both comforted and exposed. When the maid finally left, Maria let herself crumble again, clutching her hand over the ring as if it could somehow bring Stephen back. She imagined him by her side, his steady presence calming her, but as the silence of the room settled around her, she knew she was alone with only the ache of missing him.

✺

On the other side of London, Julie stood by her open window, a soft breeze weaving through her hair. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, hoping somehow to catch a lingering trace of Declan-of the scent he wore, the faint touch of sea salt and leather, something unmistakably him. But all she smelled was the cool, clean air of the early morning, empty of the warmth she sought.

She sighed, leaning her head against the window frame, feeling a pang of longing she hadn't expected, certainly hadn't wanted. Declan was... well, Declan. The thought of him had stirred something within her, a flicker she was used to ignoring, an attraction she could pass off as nothing more than admiration or curiosity. But now that he was gone, the spark had grown into something that made her pulse quicken and her mind wander, stirring memories of his sharp gaze, his quiet strength, the way he looked at her as if he could see right through her.

She hated it. Hated herself a little for it, for letting her feelings sneak up on her like this. Another pirate. Hadn't she already learned her lesson? The thought felt bitter, tinged with guilt. She told herself that she shouldn't feel this way, shouldn't be drawn to someone who would only complicate her life further. And yet, even as she tried to reason with herself, she couldn't ignore the ache she felt, the restlessness that kept her standing at the window, searching the horizon as though he might somehow appear.

The truth settled over her like a weight: Declan had slipped past the walls she had so carefully built. She had caught herself smiling at his jokes, lingering on his words, replaying every stolen glance, and now, with him gone, she felt exposed and vulnerable in a way that was maddening.

Julie clenched her jaw, gripping the windowsill. What am I doing? she thought, half-scolding herself. She wasn't some lovesick girl. And yet, Declan's absence only made her realize how much he'd come to mean to her.