A Hockey Player's Guide To Deception

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Romans 13:10 (NIV)

"Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore, love is the fulfillment of the law."

Kayla did her best to avoid Louis, but it was nearly impossible while staying under the same roof. Every encounter with him, whether a brief glance or a small conversation, was a harsh reminder of the feelings she harbored for him and the ones she assumed he didn't share. She couldn't know for sure, of course. With no experience in dealing with boys, Kayla felt completely out of her depth, unsure how to read his actions or decipher whether he liked her.... or didn't...in the same way. 

She couldn't help but wonder if her feelings were one-sided. Her mind betrayed her, endlessly replaying every insignificant moment they had shared. She recounted each interaction in painstaking detail, analyzing and rewinding every word, every glance, every fleeting expression, searching for something, anything, that might hint at how he truly felt. It was exhausting and exhilarating at the same time. 

The past two days had been hellish. Kayla had locked herself in her room, desperate to avoid any interaction. The isolation was her way of regaining control, of keeping her emotions in check. Yet, despite her efforts, her mind wouldn't stop spiraling.

Louis had noticed her shift in attitude and, to her growing frustration, had given her space. Too much space. He didn't even bother to ask what was wrong. That stung more than she wanted to admit.

This was pathetic. She was pathetic. Since when did she care if someone spoke to her or not? If someone cared or not? She'd spent most of her life as a lone wolf, thriving in her independence and scoffing at the idea of needing anyone. But now, her thoughts were a chaotic mess, and no matter how hard she tried, they always circled back to Louis.

She used to judge the girls Nathan brought home. In her narrow view, she couldn't fathom how a woman could let a man's words, actions, or even inactions affect her so deeply. After all, he was just a man.

But now? Now, she understood. She was just as muddled, just as tangled in the same web of emotions she once dismissed. It was maddening. Never in her seventeen years had she imagined that a man could occupy so much space in her head. And yet, here she was, disbelief coursing through her veins, struggling to reconcile this new version of herself with the one she'd always been. She let out a deep groan, rolling over on her bed and burying her face in her pillow. This had to stop; The swirling thoughts, the dull ache in her chest.... Louis, it was all driving her insane.

She clenched the pillow tighter, as if she could squeeze the frustration out of herself. Whatever this was, it needed to end before it drove her to complete insanity.

"Kingston! Is everything okay?"

Kayla froze as Louis's voice rang through the room, her heart skipping a beat. She sat up abruptly, her eyes wide with alarm, and ran a hand through her hair, attempting to tame the bird's nest perched on her head.

Clearing her throat, she replied, "Yeah, everything's fine."

Silence followed, heavy and uncomfortable, before Louis's retreating footsteps echoed down the hall. Her heart sank. Disappointment gnawed at her chest, leaving an ache she couldn't shake.

She felt foolish, childish, even.... for giving him the cold shoulder when he hadn't done a thing to deserve it. If anything, he'd been a kind and thoughtful host, yet she had repaid him with silence, all because he didn't want her the way she wanted him.

"How do you know, though? You never told him how you felt," a stray thought whispered, unbidden and unrelenting.

No. No, no, no. She could never—would never—admit to a guy that she liked him first. That was an Everest-sized blow to her pride waiting to happen. Not that there was anything wrong with girls making the first move. It was just...