It won't be scared away this time.

8- Thoughts.

Number 11- Go camping.

‘Shops?’

‘No.’

‘Park?’

‘No.’

‘Stay in house all day and eat popcorn?’

‘Yep.’

I bet you think it’s me saying ‘no’, but it isn’t. Erin got dumped by her boyfriend this morning, someone she had been dating for three months, by text. And, like any other teenager in this situation, she’s moping.

I’ve got this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach; jealousy. It makes no sense really- who wishes to be that girl who got dumped over text by a boy who you really liked, then sit around in sorrow for what is likely to a week. Why would I want that? Why would anybody ever want that?

Because it’s normal.

It’s life; it’s what happens to teenagers. It’s a part of ‘growing up’ to get your heart broken. Just as much as it is to get a driver’s licence, to have your first alcoholic drink, to start watching your weight and dieting- I’m feeling the exact same way I felt at Erin’s party. I won’t have any of that.

It’s just so exhausting, thinking this way. I simply want to hide my head under a pillow, block out all of the noise and pretend that I’m not Riley Porter. I’m someone else- a popular girl with all the boys chasing her, or a geek that no one likes but doesn’t care, because she knows that unlike some, she won’t end up at the McDonalds cashier at age 46.

Just not the dying girl.

‘Princess Diaries?’ Erin’s depressed mumble brings me back to reality, where she’s sorting through DVD after DVD, trying to find that ‘perfect breakup movie’ as she calls it. Like I’d know anything about it- I need a boyfriend to actually break up with.

An almost 16 year old girl who’s never had a boyfriend… I am just too cool.

We spent of the rest of the night watching films, eating junk food and giggling about the stupidest of stuff. We laughed for about fifteen minutes over a joke on a penguin wrapper. I do adore penguins though.

‘Have you ever wondered what it would be like to put a Smint in your mouth then drink coke?’ I pondered.

‘Nothing happens, I tried.’

‘Since when have you been so daring?’ I joked.

‘It was at Laurens house, they made me! It tasted horrible…coke and mint mixed is just…BLUH!’ I burst out laughing at Erin’s expression as she shuddered in the memory of it. I took the bottle of coke next to us and shook vigorously, and then turned to Erin.

‘DO NOT OPEN THAT.’ She shrieked way too loudly. I could hear Mum and Dad mumble a bit in their sleep upstairs, but fortunately they didn’t wake up. They would probably flip out about the mess we were making. They hated when things got sticky, and we’d already spilled about five cans of coke. I’d love to see what they would look like if I opened the coke onto them. I put the coke down, with an idea formulating in my mind, just like with Uncle Morten- I’m so sly. Erin was here too, so she would probably go along with my plan again. She was like the Robin to my Batman.

‘Erin, have you got any mints on you?’

***

Sneaking up into your parent’s room without making a noise is difficult when you are extremely hyper and constantly giggling. Not to mention the crazed, post break-up sister that keeps laughing evilly. But we achieved it without too much of a racket, and we didn’t wake Mum and Dad so it was basically a win.

Slowly, I went under Mum and Dads huge bed with the coke bottle. When I say huge, I mean it. They got pressured into buying it by some shop guy, spending a fortune on it, but they discovered it was so comfortable that they could not return it. I reckon they just didn’t want to face the shop guy again.

I opened it gingerly; letting it make the annoying noise that happens when you open coke out before I reached my hand from under the bed for Erin to give me the mint- still laughing evilly as she did so. It’s a wonder my parents can actually sleep through this.

I put the mint in the coke, shut the bottle so fast and shook it like crazy until it looked like it was about to explode, then ran for cover. I watched in hysteria as Mum and Dad woke up screaming as there comfortable bed became drenched in minty coke. They turned to us in complete anger.

‘WHAT ARE YOU DO- Riley? Riley!’ Mum’s eyes widened in horror as my laughter turned to coughing. Unstoppable coughing. I saw blood on my hands as I tried to prevent it and doubled over in pain as I felt blood drip from my nose also: I couldn’t hear, couldn’t speak,  couldn’t breathe. I could only feel pain and panic. As my vision began to darken I wondered if this was it. The monster had completed its duty.

One thought, one simple thought stuck with me through the horror I was experiencing in that moment.

Was I really dying?