"Please?" I beg.
"No." Luke says.
"Please?"
"No."
"Please?"
"No!" he whips around to face me. "No! No! No! No, you're not allowed! No!"
I grit my teeth.
"Why not?" I snap.
It's been two months since we've been back and we're just now letting everyone over. Snyder and Armstrong are here, too, for a barbecue, and Luke is irritated with me.
"Because I said no." he snaps.
"That's not a reason! Give me a reason!"
"You want a reason?" he asks. "Fine! I said no because I don't want you to die, or get hurt, and you would be back in the agency, your life constantly on the line, guns constantly pointed at you, and you constantly making enemies! I'm not going to lose you, alright?"
With that, he turns around and moves to storm into the house. I grab his hand.
"Do you seriously think I'm going to get myself killed?" I whisper.
"No. But I can't-" he cuts off and shakes his head. "I can't watch you walk out the door every day and not know if you're going to come back to me. I know you're good at what you do, but there are so many people that will want you dead. I can't handle it."
I take a deep breath and nod slowly.
"I don't like teaching anymore." I whisper. "And I'm not making enough. I don't know what I want."
"I know." he runs his hands up and down my arms. "Just please try to understand."
I nod slowly. "I understand. That's why I joined, you know." I whisper. "For the exact same reason. I felt better when I was with you."
"When I thought you died when those people were killed off neighborhoods, I almost died. I stood there I the doorway and held my breath. Those few moments of my life were enough to make me want to die. That'll be how I'll feel every single morning. I won't be able to live like that."
"I understand. I won't go back."
"I feel bad." he whispers.
"Don't." I put my hand on his arm. "It's okay. We're okay."
I hug him.
He hugs me back, burying his face in my shoulder.
<><>
"I'm going to fucking die." I mutter to myself, dropping rose petals at the front door. I'm about to puke. I'm so damn nervous. I walk straight from the kitchen door, dropping petals, and turn left and step out onto the deck. I drop petals all the way to the glass table and set a few around the notebook.
In it, I wrote.
I'm at Mill Pond Park on the bridge over the waterfall. Come find me after you follow the other path. I love you!
And then I tape the book to the table and walk int the house. I connect petals to the original path and set them down the hall and into our bedroom. I put them on the bed, and right in between our pillows, I put the surprise, and then I change into a white sun dress that goes a few inches above my knees.
I make sure to leave my phone on the bed, and then I grab my keys and wallet and rush out the door. I've got five minutes until Luke is get to get home.
I get in the car and drive to Mill Pond Park.
LUKE'S POV
I'm confused when I pull into the driveway and don't see Alyssa's car there waiting for me.
