Golden Hour: A Team Jacob Twilight FanFic

Envy

I wasn't thinking about how Jacob arrived back at La Push when his arms were wrapped around me. I didn't know where he'd been or what he'd been doing—the thought didn't pass my mind in the moment at all. It was surreal to see his brilliant white smile and feel the feverish heat of his brown skin again. I was only focused on him being back home, safe, intact.

Internally, I was vibrating.

My Jacob was here.

It felt like the world made sense again, like the nightmare we'd been living in was only just that—a nightmare. The homesickness trickled away. My personal sun broke through the clouds to shimmer down and warm me again.

But I knew that feeling of joy was fleeting. Jake and I had always been on borrowed time. And the girl walking towards us from the car Jake must have driven here with confirmed that.

She appeared taller than me, though that could have been due to her near-perfect upright posture. There was an air of confidence in her step despite the uncertainty in her waving hand. Her silky brown hair was much longer than mine, falling to her waist. The white jeans she wore fit tightly to her legs, and her teal sweater was loose, but it was evident that she was toned and slender. Her large eyes focused on Jacob.

Not my Jacob.

Her Jacob.

The fourth wolf has been claimed.

I knew this was always a possibility, but still, I didn't expect it to hit me as heavily and relentlessly as it did. The weight of it was an anchor shackled around my ankle. It plunged me deep below, in the sea I nearly drowned in—not the blood sea, the sea that Jake rescued me from. But he couldn't rescue me this time.

I was incontestably on my own now.

I've never felt the wind knock out of me quite so literally before.

Jacob deserved to be happy; it was what I always wanted for him, and I knew that couldn't have been with me, not after everything. If I needed any more proof of that, he nearly just fainted at the sight of me since he assumed I was dead. So, I had no right to feel this way whatsoever. Nevertheless, I couldn't control it. I couldn't stop the current splintering of my heart.

I've felt heartbreak before, where parts of myself broke off and changed my shape. Where it gutted and drained me to where I saw no worth in my life. Where reality became distorted. It took everything from me. But this didn't feel like that. Not at all. While this was gut-wrenching and agonizing—the loss of something pure and good and true, it wasn't numbing, hopeless depression. It was charged.

I was livid.

When she approached, she smiled at each of us.

"Hey! I'm sorry, I didn't want to interrupt anything, I just...Jacob, can I speak with you for a minute?"

Jake stared at her, and I studied his gaze, hoping I wouldn't find something in it to prove me right. I tried to see if it was similar to how Sam, Paul, and Jared looked at their imprints. But his dark eyes revealed nothing to reassure me. I couldn't read his expression, and he appeared out of it.

He rocked on his heels with both hands in his pockets.

"Yeah, hey, sorry, um guys, this—this is Liz. Uh, Liz, this is Quil." He nodded to Quil and then hesitantly to me. "And. Um, Bella."

"Nice to meet you guys!" she exclaimed, but there was a hint of confusion scrunching up her sparkling eyes and straight nose.

"Uh, one second." He pulled one hand out of the pocket and held up his pointer finger. They briskly walked down the street while she impatiently whispered, but I couldn't make out the words. When they got to the car, I tried to read their lips. With the distance, I couldn't understand, but there was clearly something charged between them. Despite how painful it may be for me to hear, I wished to run over and listen.