Back To You ✦ Rudy Pankow

lxix. you came home

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐓𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔
SIXTY NINE — ( YOU CAME HOME ! )

               THE LAST FEW DAYS FOR SYDNEY HAD BEEN ABSOLUTE TORTURE. She had been loosing her mind completely and wasn't sure if this situation she was put in was ever going to be resolved. Her anxiety had been through the roof since that night at the bar and nothing she did made it feel any better, nothing at all. She knew the only thing that would make herself feel better would be Rudy coming home.

But Sydney still hadn't heard from him, 4 days later. She had messaged, she had called, she had sent messages through other people. And got nothing in return. Rudy hadn't wanted to speak to her and he certainly made that known.

Sydney hadn't even been able to go to set and work either. Rudy had called Jonas and asked for a few days off and Jonas had no choice but to let him. He couldn't have two of his actors filming together when they weren't even talking to each other right now. Not when they were playing lovers onscreen too. Sydney couldn't even go to set just to take her mind off things because Elaine was still there and she knew if she saw the girl again she'd do something she would regret. So Sydney had been all on her own for the past 4 days, just her and Tank. Madelyn and Chase had tried to pop in to see Sydney but they had actually been working so it was hard. And Sydney didn't always seem up for the company.

It was late in the afternoon, on that fourth day of being alone, Sydney was sitting on the sofa alone. She'd put a movie on to watch but she wasn't really paying attention. Tank had been in her bedroom, sprawled out fast asleep on the bed so she didn't even have her dogs company. She expected she'd stay in that same position for the rest of the night, there was no reason for Sydney to get up again and she quite frankly didn't feel like it either.

That was until the sound of the front door opening startled her. Nobody had keys to her apartment in Charleston. Was somebody breaking in? It hasn't crossed her mind that maybe it was Rudy.

Sydney had shot up from the sofa, the blanket that had been keeping her warm had pooled around her feet. But she didn't move. Her feet felt like cement blocks, so even if she wanted to, she couldn't. It had to have been Rudy. There was no other explanation. And Sydney's suspicions were confirmed when he walked into the room.

A lump formed in the back of Sydney's throat at the sight of her boyfriend. His messy hair and tired eyes. She couldn't believe he was actually there. "You came home." The words barely made it out of Sydney's mouth as she fought back tears.

Rudy had dropped his bag to the floor before responding. "Yeah." His voice was just as quiet as hers.

They stared at each other in silence for a few moments. "I-I don't know what to say." Sydney admitted. What was she supposed to say first?

Rudy let out a shaky breath. "Me either." He wasn't sure what he wanted to say either. A million different things running through his mind to say to her but not one forming into words for him.

"But you came back. That must mean something?" Sydney wasn't sure if it was a question or a statement. It had to have meant something.

Rudy's eyebrows were pulled together in confusion. "I'm not really sure." He still wasn't sure why he went back. Rudy had enough of living in a hotel room anyway, but that wasn't the only reason he went back.

A sigh left Sydney's mouth. "You think maybe we can talk now?" She said, quietly. Her heart was beating at what felt like a thousand miles per hour. But she needed him to talk to her. "Please." She didn't want to beg, but she would.

"Yeah, yeah. We can talk." Rudy nodded, slowly approaching Sydney. She sat back down on the sofa as he sat down beside her.

The silence was consuming but Sydney didn't know how to break it. What did she say first? It took what felt like forever for her to speak. "I feel like I should know exactly what to say, I've had enough time to think." She started with, hoping it made Rudy take the lead, he must've had more to say that she did. "But I don't."

Rudy continued to stare at his hands as he thought of what to say next. He just had to rip off the band aid. "I spoke to Drew this morning." His words made Sydney's eyes shoot up.

A lump formed in the back of her throat. "You did?" Why the hell would he speak to Drew before speaking to his own girlfriend?

"Yeah." Rudy said, his eyes meeting hers. "He called me." Oh.

"And you answered?" Sydney was confused.

Rudy nodded. "Yeah. I'm not sure why but I'm glad I did." He admitted. He hadn't wanted to answer the phone that morning when he saw Drew's name pop up on his phone but he was glad he had.

"W-What did he say?"

"He told me the truth. About what happened." Rudy started to say. "He apologised too but he didn't really need to." Over the past few days, Rudy had realised neither of them really needed to apologise to him. They hadn't done anything wrong. "And he told me that any feelings he had for you are long gone." Rudy then said, which was news to Sydney. Her and Drew had never really spoken about their feelings for each other, both too afraid of ruining their friendship.

"Right." Sydney's eyes lowered back to her hands. She still didn't really know what to say.

Rudy hesitated before asking his question, one he had been desperate to ask for the past 48 hours. "Is it the same for you?" He knew what the answer would be but still hated that part of him was worried Sydney would hesitate.

But she didn't. "Of course!" Sydney had never been so sure of anything in her life. "I would never do that, you know that." Sydney felt sick that he even needed to ask. She wouldn't do that to him.

"I know, I just had to ask." Rudy told her, wanting nothing more than to reach out and just touch her. He had missed her.

"They were gone a long time ago." And that was the truth. "What happened was just a stupid, stupid, drunk mistake." Which was the honest truth. Maybe when it had happened, Sydney didn't think it was but now, knowing how one stupid drunk night had caused so much hurt in her relationship, it was nothing but a mistake now.

"I know." And thankfully, Rudy could see that.

"But I am sorry, for not telling you." Sydney added, feeling her eyes fill with tears. She would never be able to express how sorry she was for hurting him, even if she tried. "I never wanted to hurt you, not again." Sydney couldn't control the tears falling down her face, there was no stopping them and it broke Rudy's heart seeing how she was beating herself up over something that happened months ago.

Sydney had covered her face with her hands, feeling embarrassed that she was the one in this situation crying. She didn't feel that she deserved to cry. But Rudy certainly didn't see it like that. He had forgiven her the minute he had walked through their apartment door, not that there was much to forgive.

"Hey, don't cry." Rudy reached out for her. "Come here." He grabbed hold of Sydney's wrist, pulling her across the gap in between them on the sofa. She crawled across the space and crawled straight into his lap. Rudy's arms immediately went around the girl as she buried her head in the space between his neck and shoulders, making the tears fall even faster. She had missed him so much. "It's okay." Rudy whispered into her blonde hair, feeling her body shake in his hold. He didn't ever want to let go.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

AUTHORS NOTE
i couldn't make them be apart for too long!
hope you guys enjoy the chapter!
i'm not too sure what i'm going to write after this ngl but i'll figure it out. just having a hard time writing this now with everything that's gone in between the cast and rudy haha