What If

The Truth

Michel's POV

Great, Alex's perfect boyfriend is coming to sit next to me. "Hey, nazi guy."

"Hey," he looked pissed and sad at the same time. "Maria, can I get a whisky? Make it a double, please." When she gives it to him, he downs it all.

We drink in silence for about ten minutes. I can't stop thinking about why he is so pissed off? I had a little to drink, and since I have barely been drinking, my tolerance is so shit right now soooooo... "What are you so pissed about?" I yelled at him.

"Alex," he sighed.

"Ohhh, ok, I get it, your boyfriend. What did he get called into work or something?" I snap back.

"Ya, well, I don't think he's my boyfriend anymore."

I didn't even have time to think. I blurt out. "What do you mean Alex is amazing! He's the perfect boyfriend! He's kind, sweet, caring, and funny! He's accepting, patient and understanding! He'll never give up on you, no matter how much you push him away! And he's the most beautiful human being I've ever seen! And don't even get me started on all the stuff he's good at, like music and much more! SO WHY WOULD YOU BREAK UP WITH HIM? ALEX IS PERFECT?!" Now I think I shouldn't have said that. The last thing I need is for him to know I'm in love with Alex. That will be embarrassing.

"Your right. Alex is perfect," Forrest pauses and looks at me.

"SO WHY DID YOU BREAK UP WITH HIM?" I don't get it.

"Alex is perfect, just not perfect for me." He pauses again.

"Then who?" Forrest is getting on my nerves.

"YOU, MICHEL!! He's perfect for you because he's all those things and more, but most importantly, he's in love with you, not me!" he yells.

"What are you talking about? He's dating you."

"He's dating me because you broke his heart!"

But that doesn't make sense. "When? In high school, he left me. With Maria? We broke up before you two officially got together."

"No, six months ago, the night he did open mic night here, you left halfway through the song, and it broke him! You broke him!" I still don't understand, and I think he can see that. "That day, his dad died. And that day, all the pressure to honour his family was gone. So he went to open mic night and performed a song he wrote about a boy from high school. When that guy walked in, Alex's face lit up. But he was gone when he was singing, his favourite and the most important part. So he took that as a rejection and tried to drown the pain in a different relationship and alcohol. So I had to ask Gregory and get the girls drunk to get answers."

"Ya, it's true," Maria says out of nowhere. "We're not happy about it but will let it slide because it was an act of love. But seriously, Michel, I broke up with you because I knew I could never compete with the cosmic love you two have. He hurt when you left."

"What was the next part of the song," I say, trying to keep it together.

"You're lucky I know it by heart. He always sings it when he thinks I can't hear him. It's...Umm...

I still find my father's shrapnel

Buried beneath my skin

But I've begun to heal in all the places your hands have been

Would you meet me in the middle

Could we both stop keeping score

There's a battle I must fight alone

It's you I'm fighting for

If I call off the battalion

Break my walls down stone by stone

Tear down my defences

I can build your heart a home

And if I did

Would you come home

Wish I found the words when we were seventeen

You were the best of me

You are the best of me.

You left because you thought it wasn't the right time, but all he wanted you to do was kiss him and try."

I can't breathe and think I might puke with all the new information. I run it to the bathroom and puke. After 5 minutes, my phone rings, and it's Izzy.

"Are you ok?" she asks, sounding scared. "Are you hurt? Where are you?"

"Iz, I'm ok. Why?"

"You sent something through the mindscape, but I couldn't make it out. But where are you, and what happened? Iz demands to know.

"I'm at the Pony..." but Iz cuts me off before I can finish my sentence.

"I'm on my way!" She hangs up the phone. I'm not going out and facing Forrest, so I'm staying in the bathroom.

Fifteen minutes later, I hear Izzy's heels through the barely open door. "Hey! Where is my idiot brother?"

"Hey. He ran into the bathroom, like 20 minutes ago," Maria answered

"Why!"

"We talked about Alex's song and how Alec and I broke up. I think it all got a little overwhelming for him," Forrest now answers.

"Great, I have to get him home. How much is his tab this time?" Iz huff out.

"Just go get him. I'll get it. I mean, it is my fault." Forrest answers

Then I can hear her come to the door and open it. She looks at me and gives me a bottle of acetone. I take it. "Have I told you how much I love you recently?" I say before chugging it.

"No, you haven't, but you can in the car. So come on, let's go." She drives me home in silence, waiting for me to speak if I want to, but I don't. So she drops me a simple "Bye! See you tomorrow."

"Ya. bye. Thank you for everything," meaning not asking. And I go to sleep, at least trying to, with little success.