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The sound of her bedroom door opening seems to stir Daphne awake, she still has sleep in her eyes when she makes out the figure of her younger sister coming to her bed.
"Wakey-wakey. It's nearly twelve." Ash seemed to plant herself down beside Daphne, the beams of sunlight coming through the window to kiss the bridge of Daphne's nose and cheeks.
The girl hummed, she was about to pull the covers back over her head when she saw the bagel that her sister had put down. One thing everyone knew about Daphne when she was hungover, she would never turn down food.
"Where is everyone?" She sinked her teeth into the bagel, crumbs attaching themselves to her lips as Ash watched. She was always the first to laugh at her sister.
"I don't know where Conrad is, Jeremiah and Belly went to see his aunt. " Ash started, brushing a strand of red hair behind her ear. "And everyone else is on the beach."
Daphne nodded, she wanted to be at the beach. She wanted to wear a pink bikini and sip of slushies and she wanted to have fun. She missed when summer used to be fun. When it meant getting away from all your troubles and running home. That's what this place was for them and now all Daphne wanted to do was escape. It was like the walls were holding onto her.
"Why aren't you there?" Daphne had a smile on her face, it never reached her eyes.
Ash just shrugged, once again wiping the hair off her cheek. "No, thank you." She told her older sister, turning to face the girl. When she smiled, it was genuine.
Something Daphne would have never expected.
"I wanna go home." Ash reached a hand out, wiping the crumbs off the girl's face.
Daphne paused for a second, she could still hear the ocean from where she was. If she closed her eyes, she could feel the waves but in the moment all she felt were the covers over her body. Pinning her down.
"I'm gonna stay here," she rested her cheek to her shoulder, her lips pulled tightly into a straight line.
"It's what mom and Susannah would've wanted." That pesky word seemed to worm its way into every sentence.
It also seemed to erase the smile from Ash's face.
The girl cleared her throat as she sat up, "Mum's not dead." It was something she seemed to have to remind Daphne of.
Daphne seemed to live between the past and the future, she would never sit still. Always going from one side to the other, the present didn't seem good enough for her.
When she would go back, she would think about Susannah. She would hardly think about the love the woman gave her, she only thought about losing her. For Daphne, the world wasn't even black and white, it was completely dark.
And when she thought of the future, she thought of her mother's lunges giving in. She could see herself dressed up in all black once more, ready to bury another mother.
She never stood still enough to see that life was happening right in front of her.
Daphne didn't say anything, instead she just stared off into the abyss like she always did when she no longer wanted to talk to anyone.
"Okay, well I'll leave you to it." Ash pulled her lips into a straight line, this was the last thing she needed.
She made her way to the door, tugging her pajama pants up as her slippers dragged on the carpeted floors. She heard Daphne sniff but she was always sick, always a little tired and she was always in bed.
"Ash." She heard the girl speak, her voice bright and blue like the sky outside the window.
The redhead turned, she found what she thought she would. Daphne was smiling at her, the colour seemed to be in her cheeks but then it happened. It happened so fast that she thought she had made it up all together.
Two tears streamed down Daphne's face, she wiped them away quickly as she picked up her glasses on her bedside table.
"Before you go, can we just watch a movie together?" That seemed like a stupid question but that was all Daphne wanted.
She didn't want to get up and she didn't want to talk to anyone. She wanted to be in bed and she wanted to watch a movie with her sister because it was the only thing that would give her comfort.
Ash smiled, something that always made Daphne feel important. Getting a smile from your grumpy sister meant you were doing something wrong.
"I get to choose what we watch." She kicked off her slippers, making her way over to the bed as Daphne moved over to make room for her. "You can choose." She pulled her laptop off her bedside table, placing it on top of her sister's lap.
"Even if I wanna watch High School Musical?" That was the last thing Daphne expected from her.
"Are you sure you don't mean something like The Companion?" Daphne raised a brow above her glasses and Ash shook her head.
She typed in the password to the girl's laptop and within seconds the movie is about to start. "Are you sure you don't wanna watch Nosferatu?" Daphne asked, her head on Ash's shoulder as the girl got more comfortable.
"I'm sure." Ash mumbled. "It was mum's favourite movie."
That pesky little word.
That was all Daphne thought before she tried to push it to the back of her mind. Today would be a good day. She would never think about it again. She had a mom.
She had a mom. She had a mom. She had a mom. She had a. She had. She had. She had. She.
