Run Baby. (Harry Styles)

T W O

Judgment- (n.) The ability to make considered decisions or come to sensible conclusions about another person.

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It feels like its been days on this bus when in reality, its only been hours. There is the slightest peak of sun shine coming from the horizon line right ahead of me, and that just shows how long I've been in this bus considering I left after midnight. It looks darker than it actually is due to the big mob of tall, thick and green trees that are on both sides of the road, with minimal cars driving past us.  I wish I would have sleep a little while I was on this bus, but I didn't want to risk something bad happening to Jess while I was under. However, Jess finally obeyed me and decided to take a little nap, leaning against me with her head on my stomach. She honestly had nothing better to do due to the lack of toys I brought. I didn't bring anything. The only type of luggage I brought with us were three large suit cases of whatever type of clothing I could fit in them. The two black bags and one Hello Kitty case sits on the floor against the side of the bus I lean on.  

It's devastating that I couldn't bring all of our belongings with us to our new home, where ever that may be. We had just started to feel comfortable in that small town, making friends and enjoying our self's, forgetting about the past, but I guess good things are always meant to be ruined

San Diego, Texas.

San Diego, Texas is where we were before we had to leave. No body really knows where that town is because its so small, but me and Jess managed. It was better than nothing.

San Diego is about seven hours south from Dallas Texas and that happens to be where this bus is taking Jess and I. Dallas also happens to be where I was raised, my hometown. I never thought I would be going back to that horrid place but I guess its the only place that I could be taken to by bus at one in the morning in such a small town, and I also have and advantage of knowing Dallas like the back of my hand. My last years in the city weren't the best, but my childhood there was amazing. I'm not to thrilled about going back to the place that ruined my life, but before what happened, I was the happiest girl alive and thats all I need to think about or I won't cope. I was full of happiness and loved my family and school. But everything changed in a matter of days. This was all before.

Before I got pregnant.

Not that I regret anything that happened, it was the way it happened, I love Jess more than anything, but I was in high school. I know myself that what happened was my fault and I will live with that for the rest of my life, but honestly its not that bad to live with. In fact its not bad at all. I was still a child and I was having a child, but the way it all happened was what made it life shattering and destructive to me.

I cant think about that right now.

High school for me what what you call, Hell. When I got pregnant, I was picked on, teased, and bullied. The memories of how many times I was called and slut and a whore make me want to cry here and now, even after all the time that's past, but I've tried to get over all of it. I was seventeen. Seventeen. And I wasn't the most popular girl either. I was what you call a nerd. I was always reading, doing my homework ahead of time, and never got invited to anything social. I didn't have a lot of friends either to help me when I got pregnant, most of them stopped talking to me and that other one's told me that they couldn't be seen with me. 

No one wants to be friends with the pregnant girl.

But I wasn't desperate, if they didn't want be me 'seen with me', than I didn't want to talk to them at all. I had self respect and I wasn't going to be like that. If anything, my pregnancy with Jess made me ten times stronger with my self appearance. It showed me who were my real friends and who weren't, it taught me to never want to be somewhere your not wanted, and it taught me to stand up for myself and speak freely.