The Teddy Bear Agreement | Updating

9 - the agreement

The drive home is filled with the voices of NPR hosts, talking about the world events and making it seem like everything is falling apart, but being soothing about it. I use the podcast mostly to hear voices in the background and not let my mind roam to the inevitable, but I manage to stay calm as I park in my assigned space outside our building.

It's seven pm. I ended up visiting the library after History to see if they had any of the assigned reading there and then opened up my laptop and browsed through things on Blackboard, all the while turning my answer for William in my mind. Then, around five thirty I closed all academic sites and pulled up a word document to type down the rules I would set, and which William would have to agree to do the thing.

William wouldn't be the first boy I've slept with. I had a boyfriend at the beginning of my senior year with who I lasted for three months, though Will would be the only one to purely sleep with. Ashton was, okay, Michelle and April didn't like him, but we were lab partners and he could draw very well, so I would comment on that and a friendship soon blossomed. It should have honestly stayed a friendship, as the moment we started dating we started hating each other, and the few nights we spent together in his stupid truck were nothing to be commented on. Mom didn't care, she was too deep in her hole to ask why I would sneak back home at three am and be tired the following days. It was the moment he said I spent way too much time with my friends and started making sexist remarks that I dropped it.

He didn't care, moved on like it was nothing, which I did as well, I had too many other things going on in my life to care what a serial doodler who said he'd make it big in art school had to say. After what I've seen Ray create out of pens and markers I think he will have a rough trip to disappointment town.

I move up the steps, the printed and folded sheet of paper with the rules burning a hole in my jeans pocket. Will mentioned he might be going over to his friend's dorm after class, so there's the chance that he won't be home and I'll get to decompress for a couple of hours before I have to drop the paper on him. It'll all work out, I'm sure.

Super sure.

Completely sure.

I go to unlock the door when it swings inwards and my hand holding the key stabs the thin air between me and a boy who I don't recognize. Our eyes meet, and in the same quick motion, he turns his head over his shoulder and shouts:

"Will your lady roommate is home, you want me to invite her too?"

Daniel, from my deduction, is my height, with soft orange waves that curl over his ears, he has a bit of a scruffy want-to-be beard and a dark blue tee. When he turns back to me to give me a smile his green eyes remind me of my own, and I can almost hear other people asking us if we're siblings, similar hair color and all.

"You can call me Liz, lady roommate sounds kind of weird," I say, moving past him and into the apartment. William is just entering the living room as I place my backpack down on the couch. There is a bowl of half-eaten chips and a closed jar of superstore salsa next to it, I hope he planned to clean that up whenever he came back from wherever they are going.

"Hey, Liz," Will says, giving a glance at their mess, "Dani invited us over for wings, wanna come?"

I open my mouth to decline but then become aware of the void in my stomach after just drinking an iced latte for breakfast and a large water bottle for the hours spent in the library. Boneless wings would fill that emptiness inside just fine. Having caught up on my reading and the reassurance that now I'm not just using up all my savings and will hopefully soon have checks coming in biweekly also help.

"Sure I'm down," then, to the redhead, "nice to meet you, Daniel."

He waves at me.

"Nice to meet you too, Liz, you can call me Dan, or the man of your dreams, whatever you prefer."