Road to War Part IV: The Space In Between

Hate Begins to Spill Across the Screen

The idea that he is frozen and just brought out for missions is repellant, and the closeness she feels toward him is intensely pleasant, but both feelings fade when they return to base. When Madame Pauk sees Natalia, she immediately embraces her. And as startling as that reaction is, it is easy to fall back into her usual mindset. This is her life – training with the other girls, learning to be the best at what she does. With no qualms about doing whatever she is ordered. It's a relief to be back.

They are debriefed together, and the general in charge of operations is surprisingly concerned for her welfare. He of course inquired about the details of the mission, which she gave him while glossing over her emotional breakdown that resulted. If he notices her leaving things out, he doesn't comment on it. The Soldier is mostly silent during the debriefing, and his contributions are short and to the point, as expected. The whole situation is stressful, but they get out of there without revealing anything too compromising. She has the rest of the day off, which is a strange state of affairs. The Soldier does, as well, his schedule having been postponed indefinitely until his return. It would not be remarked upon if she spent the rare opportunity in the comfort of her bed; and, if she is not alone, who's going to notice?

Days pass, with most of her life much the same. She doesn't go on missions very often, so she isn't sure if the fact that she hasn't been assigned any is due to how the last one went. She applies herself to her lessons and feels very comfortable. Of course, that is certainly due in part to the Soldier. He is affectionate, though they keep it secret, and she is lucky to have him. He's quite charming, somewhat surprisingly. It makes her wonder what he did before and how he ended up in this life. She was brought up to it, but she doesn't think he was.

Sometimes, he comes to her room during the night. It's risky, but those are the best nights. Until he has a nightmare and she sings softly to him to calm him. He frequently has nightmares, which upsets her. She doesn't usually, though his presence during one is greatly beneficial. If the other girls notice a change in either of them, no one says anything. She doesn't think they would, despite the competitive nature of the program. Most of them have some form of rebellion against the strict rules of the place, and they bond over the secrets. Not that she'll share with anyone, but she is reasonable certain that any laxness in the presence of the other Widows will not be an issue. It's Madame who is the problem.

Natalia works hard to keep their mistress from seeing any change in her. After the out-of-character affection shown in response to her return from the mission, she is more on her toes than usual. She'd known before that she was one of the best, that they were proud of her. But she hadn't expected to be more than a tool, or an asset, to Pauk, who tended to be cool and aloof. It is probably a good thing for her, but she will have to be much more careful where the Soldier is involved.

While she is eating her midday meal, she is surprised to see Yelena come into the dining hall in the hurry. Putting down her fork, she waits for her friend to approach with a raised eyebrow. "What's happened?" she murmurs as Yelena drops into the chair across from her.

"I think there's a problem with our instructor," the older girl answers, glancing nervously up and down the table.

"What do you mean?" Natalia asks, her appetite vanishing.

"The general summoned him and he refused to leave my lesson to go."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

Natalia frowns, perplexed. "Was anything else out of the ordinary?"

Yelena shrugs. "He seemed deep in thought for most of the session, so I was surprised that he was so adamant about staying. Elena was sent to fetch him, and I think she's even more terrified of him now. He was pretty scary when he refused."