Him.

Chapter 11. Pt 1

Carmen.

Isaiah.
My baby boy.
My life.
My world.
There's no way in hell I'm letting anyone take him away from me.
I haven't even been able to look at Justin since that day.
I blocked his number.
Completely deleted him out of my life.
He actually thinks he's gonna take my baby from me!?
He's lost his mind.
He ruined my Thanksgiving break I wasn't in the mood to eat or talk to anybody. The thought of going to court over my baby made me lose my appetite.
I was sad and cried a lot at first but now I'm angry and fired up with fuel, I'm a mad black woman.
My child.
The baby I carried for nine months.
Dude must be crazy.
"Carmen I really believe you both need to just calm down and talk. Seriously, y'all are adults," Johanna states while we eat our lunch in the school café.
"I could choke him," I admit sounding all kinds of crazy.
"I honestly believe y'all both just need some good hot, sweaty sex," she states making me laugh.
"Jo, why do you always believe sex can fix everything?" She shrugs her shoulders and smiles at me.
"It always makes me feel better. Damon knows his wife very well. I go from cussing him out to moaning his name," she states.
"OK TMI way too much information," I say while holding my ears.
"What you haven't gotten some since you were sixteen! And Justin has been holding out because he wants your ass. So y'all might as well get the deed done," she states.
"I'm just so mad at him right now," I say and sigh.
"Angry sex is the best sex," she states and bites into her burger. This girl I swear.
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Justin.

I promised myself that I'd be the world's best father. That I'd always be there for my kid. That I'd remember every moment.
The first time my child said Daddy.
Their first steps.
Potty training, etc...
That's everything I've missed with Isaiah.
Not only am I mad at Carmen I'm disappointed in myself. I knew something was up when Carmen up and moved to Virginia. The fact that she disappeared for a couple months and when she resurfaced she had more boobs and butt than before. I never even asked her why, I just figured if she wanted me to know she'd tell me.
I was so wrapped up in my own life I didn't take out the time to worry about hers.
The fact that my mom knew about all of this. The fact that she told Carmen not to tell me about my own kid... Not only am I hurt I'm disappointed I don't think I'll ever be able to look at her the same.
All of this weighing on me my coaches say my head isn't in the game when I'm on the court and they're right. A man can only handle so much and I feel like I'm falling apart.
Carmen is the one person I thought I'd always have in my life. The person I could never see my life without and I still can't.
"Hey man look I don't want to do this anymore. Let's just forget it," I say while on the phone. "I wasn't thinking I was just pissed off and reacting."
I get off the phone with my lawyer and get on my laptop getting in contact with Carmen the one way I know I can.
Hey Carmen,
We need to talk about all of this. Meet me tomorrow night @ 8. Somewhere private so I guess my hotel Ritz Carlton Atlanta.
I send my email knowing it'll go straight to her phone. I get a reply a few minutes later.
Fine.
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