A Girl From Alexandria

14.

I will close my eyes every day for 5 minutes, I will picture myself, happy, and beautiful, I will stay quiet, I will just walk, silently, alone, or with someone, it doesn't matter as long as I am happy.

I will close my eyes every day for 5 minutes, I will take my mind to places my feet couldn't go to. I will fly to another country, I will see other people, I will forget about everything, and just enjoy the 5 minutes trip I go to every day.

Today, I will go to Paris, the city that I saw in movies, everything looked so beautiful in Paris, I will visit the Louvre, tour eiffel, I will wear a blue jeans, a French hat, a scarf around my neck, and a black jacket.

I will breath, I will eat, and I will walk and walk until my feet hurts. I don't care about finding love but I do care about finding myself. One day I will go to Paris, my book will be translated to French, and I will have signing sessions in Paris.

If that didn't happen, and I didn't go to Paris, well, I still have the movies.

As soon as the pen left the paper, Qamar's smile was drawn, she was happy.

"May I get in" it was Ali's voice, Qamar closed the notebook, and took it with the pen and threw them quickly in her suitcase.

"One moment" she shouted, and ran quickly to the mirror, she adjusted her dress and hair, she looked to the suitcase again, and it was opened, the note book showed, she ran again quickly to the suitcase and closed it, then she hurried to the door handle. She opened it slowly.

"Hey" she said, her voice low and steady, Ali was standing outside, smiling.

"Hey" he answered, his hands were on the outside door handle "Am I interrupting something?" he asked, searching inside the room for anything that Qamar could possibly be doing, he found nothing, it was empty.

"No, not at all" Qamar said, not looking at him, slightly stressed "I was just tidying the bed" she putted her thumb between her teeth.

Ali looked at the bed, it was a mess "Good job" he grinned "It's shinning."

Qamar took his hand "Let's go outside" she leaded him to the kitchen. Her mother with Ali's were in the kitchen, one doing the dishes and the other cooking breakfast. She left his hand, and he took a seat on the table while she moved to the kettle took it and put some water in it, then left it to boil, she got a mug out and emptied a packet of 3 in 1 Nescafe mix which she loved inside it.

"Eat something first" her mom shouted, not looking at her, busy with an apparel.

"Okay" Qamar said, not paying attention, the spoon in her hand made circles inside the mug. She left the spoon, took the mug and moved to a seat next to Ali.

"My dad took your father to see the apartment he found" Ali said, his voice was thick, and his tone was low.

"That's good" Qamar's shook her head up and down as she talked, then took a sip "Tell me" she said, as soon as the mug left her lips "When I will have my books?" she cut her words, seemed to be remembering something she wanted to say "Oh" she said "I will go to the math course with you and also the physics"

"Okay, no problem" his voice was friendly "and the books will be her tomorrow, anything else." His head tilt to the left and his smile showed.

"Tell me again, why I have to take physics and math, seriously, why!" she took a sip "I hate this shit" her tone was angry but fun, her voice was loud.

"Qamar!!" her mother's shout echoed.

"Sorry mom" Qamar shouted back and grinned.

Ali laughed, then he took the mug from Qamar "I don't know" he took a sip the way she did "I hate this shit too" his voice was very low, close to a whisper, careful, he didn't want Qamar's mom to hear.

Qamar grinned "Give me my mug back" she took her mug from him "Stupid cousin" she said as she took a sip, her eyes looking to the balcony "Let's go to the balcony" she stood up, didn't wait for Ali to follow, but he did anyway, she opened the balcony door, and they both sat on the two chairs.

It was morning; the sun was warm but not hot and shocking. The sky was colored in blue and white, the breeze was cool and birds sang different songs.

"There is something with your brother Hassan, something that is worrying me!" Ali said, looking forward, to the front space.

Qamar turned her face to him "What is it?" she asked, her eyes worried.

Ali was thinking again if he was going to speak or not, he seemed hesitated, he looked to the ground quickly and then back to the space "He just keeps telling me, I want to meet girls, I want to go out with girls, I want to..." Ali hesitated, didn't say the word.

"Sleep with girls" Qamar suggested the missing part of his sentence.

Ali's face started to get red, he rubbed the hair in the back of his head with his hand.

"I know" Qamar said, voice confident and serious "nothing to be embarrassed of" she smiled, but Ali was still not looking at her "Listen to me" she said trying to get his attention "You know that black box called the TV" she grinned, and Ali's attention was now on her "people can use this device in many things, me for example I watch foreign movies, it's like my escape from reality, my dad watches soccer matches, Zahraa, cartoons of course, Mom, cooking shows, Mohamed thinks that this device is a sin and we shouldn't watch it, he used to yell at me when he finds me watching movies, especially, romance" Qamar poked Ali with her elbow he smiled, she continued "But Hassan, I caught him a couple of times watching channels that shows eastern dance and dancers, he used to sneak out thinking we all were asleep, and he stays up late, watching these channels, starring at those ladies bodies for hours"

"Why didn't you talk to him?" Ali asked; his voice low.

"I wanted to" Qamar answered "But I can't" she blew her breath out, she looked to the ground hesitating, wanting to say something "You know" her voice popped out "I also caught him checking over my friends as they walk"

Ali didn't respond, he seemed uncomfortable with the conversation, Qamar noticed that.

"Where is he anyway, I didn't see him or Zahraa" Qamar tried to change the subject.

"I think they went with the fathers" Ali answered, his tone was comfortable now "Get ready" Ali's tone got exited "We are going out"

"Now!!" Qamar's surprise appeared on her eyes.

"Yes, now, go" he stood up and moved his hand to the direction of the balcony door.

Qamar stood up, walked to the room and got her scarf. She put it over her head as she did always, then she got out the room where Ali stood.

"Mom, Mrs. Ehsan, we are ready to go" Ali shouted, it seemed that this was arranged before.

"Okay honey we are also ready" Ali's mom said, and she and Qamar's mom were now outside the kitchen, both dressed up and ready to go.