The Family that Stays Together

Chapter 5: This is my story

"What?!" Brian yells with his voice. It's kinda scary, he has used his voice lightly some times, but not in this tone. He carries on speaking with his hands and his high volumed voice saying: "You told me your dad was dead, why do you tell me now that that monster that was here is your dad?!".

I guess I have no choice, we sit down and I have to tell him what I couldn't tell him back at the coffee shop. I tell him that even though it sounds ridiculous, like something straight out of a movie, this was real, this is my story. Brian tells me to not worry, he stops talking and pays close attention to everything I have to say.

It all started about four and a half years ago when I was 12. My parents had a good relationship as husband and wife, not perfect just a normal one. My mom and dad were hard workers, my dad was a mechanic and my mom a doctor, a psychiatrist to be correct, her specialty is the pharmaceutical area. In fact she made the most money, somehow she was connected to the big bosses of the industries.

Anyways, they both took really good care of me and kept me in a good private school. I would come home everyday to both of them really tired, they would shower, eat and just lay on the couch watching TV, none of them paid attention to what I had to say, especially my dad, they were so exhausted they just nodded at some stuff I said, completely unenthusiastic. This was every single day, it was driving me nuts, but come to think about it, it was better that what I am living now.

Suddenly one night my parents started arguing about something. I'm not exactly sure about what it was but I think it had to do with the fact that they didn't plan or did anything productive as a family. They were both pointing fingers at each other, passing the blame to one another. And every single night the fights just kept getting worst.

This went on for 6 months, it was unbearable, sometimes my dad would hit my mom and she and I would hide, suddenly it seemed like it all had stopped and my dad was remorseful of what he had been doing, my mom stupidly went on to forgive him, yet I was still scared and thought that I would try to sleep with one eye open.

The next day I did whatever I could to avoid my dad, he looked at me hoping I would start a conversation with him, would have done it if he didn't just sat there completely quiet, but I just kept on walking and stayed in my room that whole day. After those events I had been through the past months I was always alert for anything, I could never be calm, I was always on the look out and thankfully I was, that same night, something even worst what going to happen. I tried to stay awake but I was so tired I fell asleep.

A few hours later, I woke up to my dad pining my mom against my bedroom wall, while she was yelling at him to let her go, I didn't know exactly what this was all about, neither did I know what to think of it, but in the adrenaline rush I ran to my closet and grabbed a baseball bat. I ran toward my dad and yelled at him to let her go, he didn't hear me, he was to busy holding my mother, so I hit him on the shoulder. He let her go and my mom recovered and was able to grab me and run to the kitchen. She grabbed a phone and called 911, while we were cornered on the kitchen drawers. My dad approached us as my mom frantically looked around and grabbed a knife to use it in our defense. As my mom was pointing the knife at my dad and started yelling: "Stay away!" to my dad. Someone answered her call and she told them everything that was going on. She said that: "Her husband went crazy and was trying to kill her and her son". My dad kept his distance and kept looking at me and my mother. My dad had a huge opportunity to escape, but he didn't, he just stood there looking for a way to tackle us, waiting for an opening moment to attack. My mother just kept swinging her knife to him, while still holding the phone over her ear, explaining to the operator everything that was currently happening. "Hurry!" my mom was yelling. I believe she was referring for the police to hurry up. As for me, I just hid behind my mother, for what seemed like an eternity. Suddenly, nobody was talking, it's like my mom and dad just had a long staring contest, while the tension and suspense of hoping that it would soon end, was eating me alive. My heart was pounding so fast, I was sweating like crazy, I could feel the streak of it running down the back my neck and forehead. I could barely see what was going on, I was tearing up in fear and my eyes were so watered I could only see a blur. I blink to try and see what was going on but at the same time I knew it was bad for me to watch. My dad was starting to hyperventilate, he was breathing while idling menacingly. He freezes for 10 seconds... Suddenly my dad charged at my mother trying to swipe the knife or at least toss it away. As they wrestled I looked away, I couldn't make out what was happening in shadows I saw. In this struggle, my mother bumped into me really hard, slamming my head onto a drawer, it caused me to lose consciousness as I heard them fight while fading away into complete darkness.

When I woke up I saw red flickering lights, I heard a lot of chattering and an engine running very loudly. I realized I was laying on a bed, in an ambulance. I was completely confused of what was going on. I saw the paramedics and quickly called out to my mom. She then answered as she was right above my head. She caressed my head and gave me a kiss on my forehead, and said she was so happy that I was ok. I felt safe and at peace, so I relaxed and continued to lay my head back. The paramedics closed the door and we were off. After 25 minutes or so we arrived at the emergency room, where they proceeded to check me first, I felt fine, just a little drowsy and my head hurt where I had bumped it. As I was left alone by the nurses, a police officer came by and asked my mom to answer a few questions, my mom said: "Can we do this away from my son? I don't want him to hear this now". So they went into a corner and I saw them talking and as I tried to hear what they were saying. I couldn't hear much, there was a lot of beeping noises around and some patient was yelling about wanting to go home to his wife. But in all this commotion I was able to make out the name of my dad. I asked myself: "Where is my dad?" "What happened to him?".

After a few minutes the police came to me while I was alone and asked me what I had seen. So I told them everything exactly as to how I have been narrating this story. When they left my room, my mom asked me what I had said to them. To which I responded: "Everything I saw while I was conscious".

My mom sighed and looked away in silence for a few seconds, I took this opportunity to ask: "Where's dad?"

My mom took a looked down, took a deep breath and rubbed her eyes and said: "I'm sorry Kevin, your father... He's... He's dead..."

I was shocked, and quietly said: "What?".

My mother proceeded saying: "When you hit your head you dropped to the floor, I was trying to push your father away, he had me pinned against the kitchen counter, but I wouldn't let go of the knife. Suddenly the police came in and they shot your father". Her voice broke as she said: "It all happened so fast, I didn't know what to make of it". She bowed her head and sniffed.

I laid back on the bed and turned to my side, asking myself it this was all my fault. Was it right to have hit him with the baseball bat? Was I the one who started the fight? Am I to blame for my father's death? These questions were repeatedly on my head until I succumbed to my sleep.

The next day my mother went to trial, as we approached the courtroom she told me she didn't want me to go in. She said to me: "I have caused you so much trouble all this time, I have not been a good mother to you, I ignored you and didn't show any interest in your life." She sobbed and continued saying: "I am so sorry for that, I don't want you to go in there because I don't want you too feel any more pressure out of this mess. If I get out of this well, I promise, I will be a good mother to you, just pray that justice is made." She kissed me on my head and I couldn't help but hug her right there, she hugs me back and sniffs, then lets me go and says: "Okay". My mom then entered the courtroom as I stayed outside with a police officer. I looked around staring at the same paintings for hours. The only interesting thing to look was out the window, watching everybody go by and wishing I was one of them, not being here but being out there having a normal daily life. But instead I was in there asking myself the very same questions I had while in the hospital.

A few moments later my mother came out and hugged me. She told me we were free to go, I was somewhat happy I was with her and I felt calm and safe. Yet still asking myself these questions: "Was it right to have hit him with the baseball bat?" "Was I the one who started the fight?" "Am I to blame for my father's death?".

That same day we packed our stuff and moved out of the house. We didn't want to stay in a place where people were always asking us questions and reminded us of a horrible time. We wanted something new. I still remember taking Highway #22, looking at the sign that said Km. 112.1. And just traveling to another town in hopes of a calm new life.

"And that Brian is my story" I tell Brian.

He still looks at me pretty confused and tells me: "I don't understand." He then asks me: "What does that have to do with you experiencing abusive fathers all the time and making you end up here?".

"Well that's a whole other long story, I don't think you would want to hear it" I respond

"No, I want to hear it" Brian tells me.

"Well, ok" I say: "If that is what you want".