Be My Naseeb

Chapter 4

Dear Khalil,
Who am I to blame? Is it myself for loving you or you making me fall in love with you ?. Unconsciously a part of me had become yours and living everyday without you seems like hell on earth.
Recalling those memories we shared together,I wish i was better in loving you.Even though i did love you with my entire being,i couldn't wipe away your silent tears.
Hayati, thérè's almost no insanity left in me.Like Layla and Majnun,i had become your Majnun(A person who has losed her sanity).My night had become dreadful without you in it and my day,as plain as an unseasoned meal.
Hayati,tears rolled down my eyes like a flowing river,my heart aches for your présence, a longing so profond it makes me a night dweller,wandering your name through thé nights.
Dear, even though this letter might never get to you, I will write everyday to proclaim my love to you and to ask for your forgiveness for being so selfishly in love with you

Yours,Aayat.

Thé pen hit thé bed as i released it from my hold, tears had soaked thé bedsheet.i clumisly folded thé paper and kept it in my safe box, This is thé second time writing to him and my heart feels lighter after that session

I took out my prayer mat and tesbih.performed ablution and observed Tahajud(midnight prayer).It was 2am and i had turned it to a tradition whenever I find it difficult to sleep.

I raised my two hands and made dua."Ya Allah,extinguish this pain from my heart and give me thé best of your blessings."I poured my heart out continously to my creator until hé put me to a deep slumber.

It's nice being back
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