1) The first promise that's always broken.
"I promise I won't leave you."
So many people have promised me this. They say it again and again. Well. I have now learnt its complete bullshit. People won't stay in your life forever, no matter what they say or do. They are bound to leave. And when they do leave, its going to hurt. A lot.
When they say they won't leave you, its a complete red zone. You've probably had someone break that promise to you before. And you can tell them that. You know what they'll say? "I'm not like that. I promise I won't leave you. I won't hurt you." I've finally learnt that they are wrong. Yeah they might even think and believe that they'll be with you "forever" but its very unlikely that it will happen. Both sides of the relationship might think you'll be together forever but in reality, you won't. This promise is just a natural promise that anyone will say at the start of a relationship. It's gets you to trust your partner. It allows you to let your walls down because you think someone will finally be there for you. But then bam. You're wrong. And they have gone. This promise is probably one of the worst. They promise you they won't leave, they won't go, they will stay with you. But when they do, it hurts the most. The day they said it pops up in your head and then everything crashes down because promises aren't meant to be broken. It leaves you thinking what the hell you did wrong, what you could change, what you could do different. But then, its all too late I guess.. Promising someone that you wont leave, is a bad idea.
2) the second worst promise.
"I'll never hurt you."
This one really sucks. If you're a emotional person like me, you'll understand that if someone said this to you then you'll rely on it a lot and you'll always believe them. But this promise really hurts. (No pun intended). It will hit you hard if your relationship ends because your partner will be hurting you. If they break up with you and you really liked that, your heart will probably smash into a million pieces and your world will come crashing down. They never did hurt you in your relationship. They never intended to hurt you. But when they break up with you, that's the thing that hurts. That's the promise that got broken. Out of everyone who has hurt you before, they would be different. But then they prove you wrong.
3) This one brings your whole relationship in. It's not really just one promise but a ton. It's about the future.
"Let's go to this place"
"Let's do this" etc..
These promises/plans really do suck. You and your partner will say all these exciting plans, adventures, holidays, but then the hard reality comes, you break up and you never do them. When you do break up, the first couple days/weeks, you'll always be thinking about the trips that you never went one. You think about what you'd do and how fun it would be but its too late. They could of promised to take you to a billon places but it doesn't matter now. You can't go with them. It hurts. The rest of your life, those places might come up and you'd just flash back to when you were so happy and you thought you'd go there with them. These promises are cold. You think because of all these places you will go to, that you'll be together forever, but you won't..
4) this one is kind of rough.
"I love you".
They might not promise it but its a promise in itself. The L word is one of the biggest words in the world. It's incredibly important. But most people just say it because they can. No one ever understand that love is a massive thing and that you shouldn't just say it because you're in a relationship. You should only say it if you really feel it. Love is a big, special thing to me! Why can't it be for everyone else. In my first serious relationship, it took me about 2 months of going out with the person to actually say it. Love is complicated and weird and I don't know. It's hard but easy and its so so so so confusing. all I hope for is that whenever you or anyone says " I love you". They completly mean it.
But then there we have another problem. What actually is love? Does anyone know? A person could make you feel extremely happy, but is it love? Is someone caring for you love? What is it? That's what always has bothered me. How are we meant to feel something if we don't know what it is and if we don't actually know what it feels like?! Love is crazy.
There is also different types of love. Family love, friend love, object love, relationship love. Are they all the same? Or are they different? What is love?
I don't think I'll ever know.
That's where the hard bit comes in. I only say "I love you" if I feel that I mean it. But then how do we know if we mean it. Because each time I've told someone ive loved them, they go breaking my heart. And that makes life a lot worse because I thought I did love them.
But then it gets worse because they said I love you too.
Love is a huge promise and a huge part of life. "I love you" is a promise that gets broken, smashed, ruined, shattered.
