Chasm

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Chasm

The Cross brothers had an older brother.

It shouldn't have been the groundbreaking revelation that it felt like right now; practically everyone had older siblings, but the fact that Schneider never mentioned him struck me as odd. Maybe he was estranged from this older brother the enemy seemed to be hunting for. Or, more realistically, it might not have come up, seeing that I'd only known the man a mere few months.

There was just so goddamn much I didn't know about Schneider.

On the other hand, he knew all there was to know about me. He knew who I was, what I'd done to get into prison, my former career, my crushed dreams and ambitions, and who my favorite contestant on Love Island was. He knew just about everything.

I, on the opposite corner of the ring, didn't know jackshit about him, other than what he'd chosen to reveal to me.

There was a very obvious and sizable imbalance of power in our ... relationship, if it could even be called that. Schneider maintained all the power because he always had all the information and resources, while I floundered about in the dark, and on the occasional trip-up, needed his aiding hand to stabilize and rescue me. Would my newly-cultivated influence back in prison even make a difference? Or would he waltz back inside, push me aside and treat me like a stay-at-home housewife?

He hadn't even bothered to tell me he was leaving on a mission. Of course, he never expected to be ambushed and taken prisoner, and for me to remain in solitary for as long as I did, but the fact that he didn't even concern himself to let know he was leaving still hurt something awful.

Were things always going to remain this way between us?

At this moment, Schneider felt further away than he'd ever been. A wide chasm stretched between us.

It seemed that my face betrayed my inner doubts, because Schneizel seemed to know exactly what I was thinking about when he said, "He probably couldn't bring himself to see you sitting in solitary, especially since he'd made up his mind to leave you there for your protection."

I hesitated.

The thought hadn't crossed my mind before.

"How do you know about that?"

"I keep tabs." Schneizel said by way of explanation, but it only invited more questions.

"Whyever for?"

"For things like this. My family tends to attract trouble wherever they go. This is our misguided way of watching out for one another."

"It doesn't excuse him, though."

"You're right. It doesn't. We're fools like that, him and I. We act from a place of fear, because we've both finally found something we never thought we deserved to find."

Heart beating so loudly I could barely hear myself speak, I asked with a shudder in my voice, "What's that?"

Schneizel's eyes darkened nearly black when he said, "Love."

I sniffed. "That's not fair."

Schneizel cocked a confused eyebrow.

"You look exactly like him. I mean you're his twin, but you're not him, so when you say stuff like that, I know it's not him saying it, but..." Like a fool, I rambled then trailed off. Embarrassed by the sentimental display, I turned away from him and angrily wiped the tear that escaped my eye. Schneizel must think me an idiot, and he wouldn't be wrong.

As I looked down at the chasm, I saw that it wasn't as deep as I'd originally thought it was. Schneider, like myself, was a flawed man, but even with all his shortcomings, I loved him still.

I could box his ears about his poor decision-making skills once I found him.

"I promise you, Julian, we'll find him.."

Swallowing back the lump in my throat, I turned back to him and said, "I'll hold you to that promise. Now, who's your older brother?"

The room's door burst open and I jumped.

Cade ducked his head and stepped through the doorway, shoulder-first.

His eyes found me first, then settled on Schneizel with a fierce glower that I was very thankful wasn't directed at me. "You son of a bitch. I was your right-hand man for years and I never even got a letter from you?"

Schneizel unapologetically shrugged. "I couldn't risk it. I was already taking a risk writing to Schneider."

"That's some bullshit."

"You would have done the same if you were in my place."

Cade's eyes seemed to glow in his hardened face, while Schneizel's had gone impossibly black.

I'd forgotten how menacing Cade was, and with his lion-like man and full beard, he looked like a Viking just about ready to do battle. Schneizel, on the other hand, was something else entirely. The image of a fire-breathing dragon flashed in my mind. He was chaos and power incarnate, a force to be reckoned with.

Choking tension poisoned the room's air, and with both large, muscle-bound men squaring off, the room seemed to shrink in size. It was getting positively claustrophobic.

Self-preservation silenced any protests I might have had. I doubted either man would listen to me, anyway.

With growing anxiousness, my eyes darted between the two.

Who would be the first to make a move?

It turned out to be Schneizel.

All traces of violence vanished from his countenance and his shoulders lost all tension, and the air along with it. He grinned and I had to tell myself it wasn't Schneider.

Cade, too, followed suit and mirrored his friend's grin. "Tell me you missed me, you asshole."

"I didn't miss your constant nagging."

They embraced in a heap of muscles and biceps and I let out the breath I hadn't known I was holding.

*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

My poor baby. Seeing Julian so lonely hurts my heart. :( 

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