Forbidden Pleasures

5

A week later
Amari

I don't know what, but something has been up with Carmen lately. She's been acting really distant lately. To make up for the spa day she missed Daniel and I decided to throw a cookout. The timing couldn't have been better. His boss actually let him get the whole week off. This might actually give me time to figure out what he's up to. But anyway, Carmen didn't tell me where she was or anything. Every time I try to ask her about it she just changes the subject. She submerged herself at work and doesn't even have lunch with me anymore. I don't like the feeling that something is wrong with her and she's shutting me out. But maybe that's her way of saying that it's none of my business and to leave it alone, so I will. But secrets have a way of coming into the light when the keeper wants it to happen the least.

I take the hamburgers out to Daniel to grill. "Be careful baby. The flames might burn you. After handing him the plate I lean forward to his ear. "I know I fire you can put out after the guests leave.", I whisper. "Why you trying to start something?", he laughs. "The question is will you finish.", I say as I step away and walk back into the house. We're trying to get everything done before people get here. That way they can have food to eat as soon as they get here. I know for a fact my greedy ass neighbors will come over to be nosey and get a plate of food. After the cookout we're going back to Daniel's place to "talk" about something with his job. I'm guessing it's about another business trip. Which makes sense on why his boss would give him a week off. I never knew advertising could take so much energy. I go into the kitchen to stir my chilli, and to check on my hamburger dip. Since this isn't one of our house parties we're trying to keep it simple. But I like for people to leave my house full so I had to have an assortment of food. More than likely people will be bringing their kids so all I brought was soda and juice. Now if this was a House Party (which for me means no kids) I would have plenty of liquor spread out on the table. Drink how ever much you want just be smart about it. If you get drunk you better have a DD (Designated Driver) because you won't be staying in my house. I'm all for having fun but nobody wants to deal with with a drunk person while they're trying to have fun.

We have a good bit of people here. Of course when they heard there would be free food and music some arrived early. Typical. Everything is cooked now. We have hotdogs, hamburgers, corn on the cob, and hamburger dip. I have my stereo on so they can enjoy some music while they eat outside and mingle with one another. I between Daniel and Sebastian, just listening to the music playing. "I'm Really Hot", by Missy Elliot plays from the stereo. "Come on sis dance with me.", Sebastian says while getting up from his chair. "Boy go on somewhere, I have one heels.", I say waving him off. "You can dance in those.", he say pulling me out of my chair and forcing me to the dance area. "Sebastian, I haven't danced in five years.", I plead. "Dancing isn't something you forget to do.", he points out. "Just listen to the beat.", he adds. I take a second to listen. Just like old time my body automatically throws into the rhythms of the bass. Before I know it Sebastian and I stand dancing like we have one brain and as if we choreographed the dance. People started started starring at us in amazement when we did the Jerk then whipped the Nae Nae. I look over to see Carmen in the flesh.

Carmen

Everybody was hype for some reason. I was intrigued to see what was going on. Load and behold it was Sebastian and Amari dancing like we use to. Amari waved for me to come and join, and of course I can't pass up the opportunity. I stand on the other side of Sebastian and as if I read their minds started dancing in perfect sync with them. Now this brings back good memories. We were dancing together since we were kids, all the way up until high school were we were the hottest dancing trio at our school. To be honest we never should've stopped. To make our reunion worth while. "So Excited", by Janet Jackson feat. Khia came on. We all remember the routine. As soon as Janet's verse starts we start our signature routine. We hear an applause as we move in perfect motion. Sebastian did his back flip, twisting in the air before he landed on his feet. He stayed on perfect beat. We continued dancing as if we never stopped. When the song ended everyone was clapping as he left of the dancing area. We gave each other high fives. Daniel came over and hugged Amari. Sometimes I wish I had that. Someone to give me love and affection without me asking or having to propose an offer of a one night stand. "Hey sis, I'm gonna use the bathroom real quick. I look too cute to be sweating.", I said. "Okay. Don't run off anywhere.", she said. I laugh it off knowing that she was throwing shade at my absence. I walked into the house in search for the bathroom. Its not too often I come here, mainly because of how much I work. When I open the bathroom door I see a couple making out like two teenagers under the bleachers after curfew. "Oh hell no! If y'all don't show some damn respect to my sister's house. Get the fuck out!", I say through clenched teeth. They sucked their teeth. "Man I told you was gone get caught.", the guy said. "Cute outfit.", the girl compliments. I suck my teeth. "Mhm.", I hum. After they got out I closed the door. I reached for up in the cabinet for the washcloth. I wet it with cold water before I dab onto my skin. I really didn't mean to shut everybody out. I just needed my space. It probably hurt Amari that I didn't want to tell her what was wrong with me. I just want my past to stay behind me. That includes Justin. I haven't spoken to him since that day, and I haven't tried to go back to The Palace either. I don't ever wanna see that man again, he brings up too many things I'm trying to forget. After I finished cleaning myself up I went back outside to hear Daniel calling my name. I go over to see what he wants. "I have a friend I want you to meet.", he says. I fold my arms over my chest. "I know you not trying to set me up with one of your coworkers. Those uptight men at your job don't stand a chance.", I say. This wouldn't be the first time he tried to set me up. Mason comes to mind. He had potential until he opened his mouth. We talked about his life for the whole date. Then he abruptly left, taking bout his uncle was sick. Leaving me with the bill, and since he drove I had to hail a cab home. Then he had the audacity to call me the next day for a second date. I called him everything but a child of God before I hung up on him.

"No, he's a lawyer. We crossed paths when I tied that deal in Tampa.", he explained. I sighed in frustration. "Fine, where is he?", I ask. "He's over there. Hey Justin! Come over here man.", he yelled to someone not far from us. When I say the person walking towards us my face turned sour. To say that I was pissed off was an understatement. He approached us and smiled at me. "Seriously, Justin? ", I say annoyed by his presence. "You two know each other?", Daniel looks confused. "Remember when I told you about the girl that got away from me in college, and how I'd do anything to get her back. Yeah well, this is the girl.", he said while his smile got wider. "Small world. I'll leave you two to catch up.", Daniel says walking away. This will be brief. "I haven't heard from you since that day. What's up with you?", Justin asks with concern. "You weren't supposed to hear from me, and using Daniel to get to me was low.", I said. "I told you the other day I'm not letting you go again. I meant that.", he says with confidence. "Well I don't want you to hold on to the past. That's how people get addicted to drugs.", I'm not trying to give him too much of my time. "So you do still care?", he raised an eyebrow smiling. "Don't put words in my mouth. I'm apart of your past and there is no future with us, understand that now. The sooner the better.", I snapped at him. When we were in college you used to always read me like a book. "I still know you Carmen. More than I know myself. So I know you blame me for everything. But you can't hold onto this forever.", he says making a valid point. "I know I can't hold on to it, which is why I let go of you.", I say turning my back on him. He catches my arm and pulls me into him. His lips landed on mine. His tongue asks for permission, and on impulse I grant his wishes. Butterflies form in my stomach and the world seems as if it stood still. I close my eyes and my hearing becomes heightened with the sound of my heartbeat. This feels so right. I feel wanted again. Memories of our love play like a movie in my mind. No, I don't want this. I can't. I push him away. He holds me close. "Stop.", I say on the verge of tears. I can't go back to him, I won't. "Carmen, I love you. No matter what you say or do, you can't push me away from you. Because I'll always be in the place you wish I wasn't. In your heart.", each of his words weighed down on me like a pile of bricks. He was telling the truth. But there is no way in hell I'm letting him back in my heart. He's not ever going to be apart of me. My love for him died along with my unborn child. I push his arms off of me. "Leave me alone. I don't want anything from you.", I say trying to get my words to discourage him. "You can't find our love through a one night stand.", his words cut me like a razor blade. I pulled my hand back and slapped the taste out of his mouth. "Fuck you.", I turn my back on him before walking off to mingle with other people. I came here to enjoy myself and that's what I'm gonna do.

Amari

"You're going to Barcelona?", part of me wants to be happy for him but the other side wants to do a hit and run and his boss. We made it to his place once everyone went home. "I'll be gone two months tops.", he tries to reassure me. "Okay, by all means make your money. I won't stop you. But when you get back here you better come with your A game.", I explain to him. Damn, two months without sex. His boss is way off base with that one. "Baby you know when I get back I'm gone lay it down.", he reassures me. "We have a week to make up for it though.", he adds in. I get up off his bed and into the bathroom to change.

I step back in the room. Ready to sex my man. He's occupied with the tv in front of him. I in front of him and straddle his lap. His hands reach to cup my butt. "I told you there would be a fire you had to put out.", I said. "You didn't say it would be this hot. Damn.", we share a laugh. He lays down to let me take control. "I get to pilot tonight baby?", I ask. "Only for a little while. Enjoy it while it lasts. Don't try to tease me either.", he warns. "No promises.", the look he gave me sent me into a good laugh. "Okay, I'll keep it too a minimum.", I say crossing my fingers.