Controlling Conscience of a Monster (Akatsuki no Yona Fanfiction)

Chapter 1- The Power of a Monster

 Don't mind the song. I just wanted to add some background music for those of you who have a hard time imagining some scenes, thoughts, or whatever. Heck, just listen to it for no reason if you want (It can be calming, I guess). The whole story starts from the flashbacks, and it follows up until a certain point, then things get creative and stuff. I'll try to publish chapters as fast as possible, so no worries there. Sorry for any name errors or grammatical errors, or any errors for that matter. I'll try to make this long, since it's the first chapter, so enjoy!

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  Zeno-Age 7-

I blacked out again today...I've been doing that more often, and what I'm worried about is what I destroyed while I was out. Usually, I would wake up to see a whole mess of things around me, and somehow I doubt this time was different.

Blood. I was covered in it, and from the smell, it was awfully fresh. I ran down the hall towards where my Granny's room was, following the blood trail, and I was horrified. The walls were painted red with the disgusting stench of iron seeping out of every corner.

   In the middle of the small room, a mass of mangled body parts were in a pile, with the head being the only thing recognizable; Granny . Under other circumstances, I would have ran for help, help from the local guards, or neighbors, but I already knew what happened. That thing  inside of me did this. That thing  that makes me a Monster.

Collapsing onto my knees, I cried, loudly at that. The neighbors were banging at the front door, telling me to shut up. At some point, they stopped. Glad they left, I dried my tears, still hiccupping every minute or so, and saw a letter on her nightstand.

   "It was my fault..." I whimpered, "It's because she took a Monster like me in..."

  Granny wasn't my blood relative, she's my foster mother. I was abandoned by my real 'Family' as a newborn, and Granny's taken care of me since. I had tried my best, ever since I learned about what I was, to keep the Madness at bay. She helped, too, but I guess she knew this would happen someday.

Before walking over towards the note, I decided it was best to give 'old granny' a proper burial, so I got all the things needed to dig the hole. To be honest, you would think a kid like me doesn't have enough strength to carry another body, even if it was mangled, to a hole that was pretty deep. Like I said, I'm a monster, so I have irregular strength for a small-bodied child my age. I finished up, grabbing a large piece of wood , and carved everything needed on a gravestone before putting it on top of the grave.

  Walking back, I took the letter and read it, crying, for she was still so kind.

'Dear Zeno,

  If you're reading this, I assume I've already passed on.

 I am so sorry for leaving you alone in this cruel world, and I hope you can forgive yourself, for it was not you who killed me. Please don't blame yourself, and live on, for me. Please.

   I know that I'm an old lady, and you may not listen to me, but head towards the Crimson Dragon castle, and speak with the general of the wind-clan, Mun-Deok  ((Not to ruin the serious moment, but his name is Mun-deok, right?)) . You'll find help there. Look in my drawer for the letter to give to the both of them, and DON'T read it whatsoever, for it's not your time to know yet. There should also be a symbol that will allow you in the castle.

Don't forget that I love you very much, just like my own son, and I'm glad I got to see you grow up to an understanding age. I have to go now, and try to avoid the villagers at all costs, don't question this. It's for your own good.