Everything's Changed

TWENTY-ONE

Chapter Twenty-One

It was now approaching the second full week of February. Since his birthday the month before, Mark had barely left his room. It was becoming an increasing struggle to walk around without wanting to keel over and sleep. Numerous nurses and doctors had been around checking that he was doing all right after Mark had refused to spend his final weeks in some hospital bed. Since the start, Mark had wanted to be in his house, around his family and friends when he died and that was what he was going to do.

The rest of the lads had been round every day since his birthday, often staying for hours at a time. Sometimes, they could come one by one and other times they would come all together. Either way, there hadn't been a day so far where they hadn't managed to pop round for an hour or two to see how he was feeling.

While he was lying on his bed, unable to do anything other than sleep, Mark knew that Robbie and Ayda were in search of a house not too far away from here. Robbie had told him that he had been thinking about it for a while now, stating that there was no way he could go back to LA now. Mark felt guilty that it was because of him that Robbie was doing this and had told Robbie so a number of times. He knew how much Robbie had liked it in LA, being able to live a life in a place where very few people knew who you were. Mark couldn't believe that Robbie was going to give that all up, though, in a way, he already had.

...

It was slowly approaching Robbie's birthday now and Mark had known what he was going to give his best friend as a present for weeks now. It was under his bed and had been there, wrapped up since before his own birthday. He had told Emma about it, saying that, if he didn't make Robbie's birthday, she was to give it to him on his behalf on the day of his birthday. Emma had agreed, but still told Mark that there was every chance that he would still be here, but Mark had just said that there was every chance he might not be.

By the 12th of February, Mark had slept constantly for two days flat. He hadn't eaten anything in that time either and was now feeling weaker than ever. To be honest, he hadn't eaten properly for about a month now and he had noticed that, within that time, he had become considerably thinner. Everyone had noticed it by now and it was like Mark was only a shell now. There was barely any life left in him and that terrified them. The thought that this is what had happened to Mark because of the tumour that had now harshly taken control of him.

After dinner, Robbie made his way up to where Mark still slept and pushed open the door. He wasn't surprised to see Mark as still as anything under the sheets, the only sign of any movement coming from the sheets with rose up and down ever so slightly in the rhythm of Mark's breathing.

Robbie walked up to the bed and sat down on the side facing Mark. He looked at Mark and couldn't help but brush back the hair on his head. Mark obviously then realised that someone was with him because he let out a tiny groan from the back of his throat and his eyes flickered under their lids. Robbie smiled at him as Mark slowly opened his eyes for the first time in about ten hours. Robbie noticed how dark Mark's eyes looked; there was very little trace of the light and sparkle that had previously been there; Mark's blue irises now holding more grey than ever. Robbie hated this; hated what was happening to his friend. All he wanted to do was go back in time and make sure none of this had every have happened because none of it should've. Last year and this year were supposed to be good years for them – for all of them. But instead this had happened. Sometimes, Robbie wanted nothing more than to lash out at something or someone and force them to make things better. But there was no point. It was almost as if there wasn't any point in anything anymore, not in Robbie's world. Any meaning that had been there before was now fading along with Mark.

"How are you feeling?" Robbie asked, knowing that it was probably one of them most pointless questions he could ask at that point. The response he got was a groan from Mark which clearly signified what Robbie had known would be the answer: not good. "Do you want anything?" Robbie asked hoping he would get more from Mark this time.