Umbrella

Would anything have changed?

We sit on the couch together, yet not together at the same time. Watching a movie, you are watching I can tell, your eyes are glued to the screen, but my eyes are glued to you. But you never notice. You never see me as more than a friend, just someone to hang out with, a pass time. I'm nothing more but a friend to you. Why couldn't I just stay away from you? Why couldn't I just walk away when you came to me that rainy day and offered me under your pink umbrella. Why couldn't I just walk away from you? To you I'm just a friend but to me you are more than that, but I can't tell you that. Not when my chances are long gone. If I would have told you my feeling before he did would we be together? Would our love be as sweet as it is with him?

You are like a venom, like a disease, like a snake. Slithering around waiting for your pray to come to you, and when it does you tear it up. Instead you approached me, was I your prey? But unlike a snake you don't know what you are doing. Without knowing you spotted me, you lured me to you. The same way you made me fall for you, but you have no clue whatsoever. The hints I tried to give you, it was just like even if you were to have been alone only with me you would have still not noticed. You are so naive. Why can't you notice me? Am I invisible to you?

We became friends quite fast, we hung out together a lot. You came to me whenever you were felling down, even if it was a small thing that happened, you would still come to me. The tears that fell from your eyes tore at my heart like nothing had ever done before. I would always do stupid things just to make you laugh. Just to see your eyes sparkle and hear you obnoxious laugh. I would take you shopping just to make you happy. I wouldn't mind carrying your bags full of clothes because it felt like a real date. Something that would never happen in real life. I would always joke around with you, telling you that it was like we were dating because you always made me carry your bags. Even if what you always said wasn't supposed to be more than just a joke or just simply nagging your words always hurt me. But I never showed it, not to you at least.

"Keep dreaming frog-face" I hated how people called me that, but coming out of your mouth just sounded melodic.

Everyday after college we would walk to my house and enjoy a movie marathon, then we would sink in to our homework. You would always get annoyed when you didn't understand something, you would roll around the floor while muttering incoherent words. I would always help you even if I didn't understand it myself, we would always work it out. It was then when you smiled at me while patting my head like I was a small kid. I didn't mind it as long as I at least could feel your soft hands through my hair. I loved it when you left your hands lingering in my head to long, and then you'd smile and tell me I'm a spoiled brat. It was those times I loved the most, to see you smile.

Even if we had more friends besides each other, I preferred to be around you. I don't know how you feel but one thing I know for sure, whatever it is that you feel, it isn't the same thing I feel. It will never be. The way you look at me is not the same way I look at you. Your heart beats when your next to me, but the normal human beating, if only you could hear the beating of my heart when I am next to you. Every time you hug me, one small action you do it sends my heart on overdrive. Even the smallest touch to my skin gave me goose bumps from excitement.

From day one I knew you were trouble, but I didn't listen. I wasn't smart enough to just walk away from a door I knew I wouldn't be able to escape. Everyday my feelings for you kept growing, I tried hard to not pay attention to them, but just by glancing at you I couldn't ignore them anymore.

I embraced my feelings for you but instead ended up hurt and broken. It was my own fault. Everyday I would look at you and see that "we" would never happen. It could never happen. Like a Hollywood sign with lights of all colors I could see. I could see it in the way you talked to me, the way you smiled, the way you hugged me, the way you did everything with me. It was just friendship, nothing more. Maybe if I would have confessed something would have changed. Maybe you'd realize too what you felt for me. Maybe you'd see that behind happy smiles was a decaying face. A face that was falling for you, a face that was falling because you would only look at it with friendship eyes. But now even if I were to confess it would be to late.

That day that he came along, I acted happy in front of you, but when I was behind hidden doors I let my tears fall. I let them fall at my stupidity yet knowledge at the same time. That night I went through my phone and looked at all the pictures we took together, all the precious moments we had together. Even if they meant just simple pictures to you they meant the world to me. I looked at every picture of you that I had in my phone. My tears would fall one after another at each and every one memory we made together. No your not gone from this world but you are far gone from my reach.

Letting my tears fall I realize that I might, I could have had a shot, but I let it go. Just to keep our dear friendship. I could have been the one holding your hand. I could have been the one taking you to dinner. I could have been the one who kissed your perfectly heart shaped lips. I could have been the one who whispered 'I love you' into your ear everyday. I could have been the one..........

I could have been your other half, the one that makes you complete.

But in reality..............

Would anything have changed if I had confessed? Would you love me like you love him?

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Would anything have changed if I had confessed?

A/N: Ok so Im thinking of making this only a maybe three chapter story >< Is it ok? Thank you SO SO SO much to my beautiful subbies ^-^ I luv you all!