the same {WWBM}{COMPLETED}

• skin color and rejection •

• chapter three •

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The next day, I anxiously scanned the bustling courtyard for Jared.

The snow fluttered lazily around me, numbing my fingers and sinking through my cloth sweater.

I puffed out a quick breath, ignoring the vicious stare June was shooting me every few seconds.

I finally found him on the school steps, his hands shoved into his puffy jacket and the hood pulled all the way up to shield him from the wintery cold.

I shuffled over to him, sitting down next to him. I could feel the heat radiating off of him and I wanted to snuggle against him--but that was weird.

Jared barely glanced up at me but I got a glimpse of his gleaming brown eyes before they quickly darted back down to the snowy steps.

"Morning" I greeted him softly, rubbing my cold hands against my chapped face. I literally couldn't feel anything. Maybe I should have brought my puffy jacket too.

"Good morning" Jared muttered lowly, his hands moving under his pockets.

"How are you doing? Are you okay . . . From yesterday?" I cautiously asked him, my eyes trying to connect with his brown ones.

"Yes" he snapped quickly, a look of anger flashed through his face but was wiped off in minutes.

I swallowed. "Oh. Okay. That's good" I perked up happily, a numb smile pulling my lips up.

He suddenly blurted to me, "What are you doing? Why are you talking to me . . . As if I'm white? Shouldn't you be avoiding me -- the black boy?"

Jared's deep voice wasn't gentle anymore--it was angry and frustrated with sadness lacing every word that came out of his mouth.

My eyes widened and I shook my head, a small laugh escaping my numb lips. "What are you talking about? I decided to come and talk to you. Why does it matter if your black or white? Does it matter to you?"

Jared finally looked up to meet me, his usual glittering brown eyes were replaced with a sea of emotions. They were ranging from sadness to happiness and then, angriness-- the cycle starting over and over again.

"Does it even matter? I shouldn't even be here" he murmured under his breath but I heard him loud and clear.

"And why is that? Does it really matter if you're our color?" I questioned, tilting my head.

"Yes! It does. I wouldn't be made fun of or people wouldn't be calling me names" he whispered softly, his large hands finally appearing from his pocket and clenching tightly into fists.

"It doesn't really matter if your black, white, Asian, Spanish. We're all the same. You do know that--don't you?" I explained to him, peering deeply into his eyes.

"I think it does matter. It matters. A lot" Jared finally stated, giving me one last look before walking off silently into the flurry of snow.

==

At lunch, it was different.

Instead of everyone silent, it was rowdy and loud.

Boys were gathered around Jared's table, girls behind the boys.

I watched silently, seeing Jared's face and eyes wrinkle with hurt and anger.

The boys were sneering in his face, flicking his face every few moments when they can.

My eyes shot to the lunch helpers and they were casually leaning against the wall. Laughing and smiling at the gathering.

I frowned.

I moved closer and heard the boys sneers.

"What're you doing at our white school, nigga?"

"You shouldn't even be here. You're a nigger. We don't accept niggers"

"We don't want you. Go back to your nigger place"

"God. Look at this ugly ass color"

"You wish you weren't a nigga now--don't you?"

The boys taunted and teased Jared ruthlessly with no regret and it made my heart squeeze harshly inside of my chest from what those boys were doing to Jared.

My stomach lurched violently and I swallowed it down. I tossed my lunch into the trash can. I advanced slowly towards the table.

I shoved people aside, moving to Jared and taking his clenched hand into mine. I began to drag him away from the table.

I ignored the complaints and insults tossed towards our way. I continued to take him outside into the snowy courtyard.

I turned and saw tears trickling from his eyes rapidly, leaking down onto his cheeks and into his full lips.

I released his wrist, turning around to face him. "A-are you okay?" I gently questioned him.

He glanced at me before averting his gaze and furiously shoving the tears off of his face with the heel of his palm. "What does it look like?" he bitterly responded, his tone clipped but shaky.

"Right. Stupid question" I breathed to myself. I cleared my throat and peered up at him from my eyelashes, seeing the hurt sprawled across his handsome face. His plump bottom lip trembled violently, his breaths shaky.

"Did you want anything? A hug?" I tried to joke--even if it was bad timing.

Jared looked up at me. A bitter and angry emotion surged through his face, making me cower away and fiddle with my numb fingers. "What do you think this is? A joke? Well it's not, you little white bitch. Leave me the hell alone!" he thundered before spinning around and storming back inside.

My heart stopped beating for a second and my cheeks began to heat up. I blinked back the hurt tears ready to spill out before heading back inside.