It was a very cold night.seems i cant hold on the breath that i have.They're so happy añd im in a mess.
i can still remember those words which breaks my heart.
"lyn.i love her! cant you see?shes jealous whenever youre near!
im begging you
please let go everything we have.i cant afford to lose her.get lost!!"
You just didnt know how feel.
i dont want to show and let you know the tears which about to despair so that i run as fast as i could.my bear feet brought me to a place ...a darkest place i ever seen.i feel strange and uneasy.but i dont care at all.
all i wanted is to scream and shout..to burst all the pain i have inside.
The moment i left.no one know where i had to find.
some says im already dead and had a very hard in striving to get life.
some says maybe i was eaten by a wild animals ...which apparently lie.
they just dont know that im pretty alive and aware of everything around
......
Why?.why he choses her over me? im his bestfriend for pete's sake!.
but then i couldnt find any answers to those question i had ..
now he is going to marry leslie.
leslie.yes she is pretty..rich and a bitch one.
and even sexier than I.no wonder he gets crazy over her.
julius? i used to describe him as a greek god.he was the perfect prince whose dreaming by every girls.
....they look happy together.
after exchanging bows
they went to the reception
i was froze the moment i saw it.why? it was my own design?.how pathetic they are to stole my own wedding reception style.
i felt uneasy..i wanted to get some fresh air.
i was about to step backward when i suddenly bump into something hard .
the reason i look up.
my eyes are widen...he is staring at me.but wait..all i can see in his eyes was sadness..hurt ..and guilt? but why? he should and supposed to be happy right?
"lyn.."
"lyn ..what are you doing here?."a frustrated voice came up.
"why?.arent you happy seeing me? how sad.anyway im just here to witness your big day .im happy for you..really."
i force to smile even if was so hard as if youre bending a steel with your own bear hands.
i dont want to talk to him.i must not get here .
but before i can scape.he said something.
"sorry."
i look back.and i saw him in tears!why its strikes me inside?.
but instead of asking him why..i run again for the second time.
....
i was sitting under a mango tree.
when suddenly something caught my attention ..i saw a note..a note book to be exact.
i look around and see if someone brought it by chance .but i failed ..
it was a diary of julius.
my hands are shaking and trembling ..
my eyes widen for a seconnd time.
i've read all the realizations ...
he loves me.
all these time.it was me that he love..
i quickly pick up my phone to call him.
but its not him who answer.
"hello?"
"hello..i
was looking for julius? hes a friend of mine"'.
"you didnt know?."
"i didnt know what?". i felt unexplainable feelings..
"he just passed away two days ago.!"
"what? how?"youre lying!
"no..im not.he took his own life.he make himself live a horrible fantasy.."
i was so shock..
i run across the lane..i wanted to see him.
witthout looking anywhere.
but i felt something hit me.
and all of a sudden..it went all dark..
i can hear screams and shouts ..and asking help.
i dont want to open my eyes im so tired atlast...we are about to live together in the other place where were about to go.
i smiled and let a little drop of tears flows to my chick.
EnD.
