Robbers

thirty

// thirty //

Ella wasn't quite sure how to feel about what had happened at the convenience store on Tuesday. She'd felt ill with guilt immediately afterwards, when they were in the white Honda speeding for home. But Ryan had a much different reaction, and he'd seemed to be nothing short of ecstatic over what Ella had done.

"I can't believe you threw a jar of salsa at him. Don't get me wrong, it was incredible, I'm extremely grateful, but fucking salsa. You are the epitome of unexpected."

His difference in emotion made it difficult to Ella to continue hating herself. She wanted to feel terrible about it because that was how she should have felt about it. She'd thrown a jar at an older man and knocked him to the ground, and then there was the obvious crime of helping to steal a couple hundred dollars from the convenience store. She wanted to hate herself for what she'd done, but Ella was honestly and truly starting to have difficulty feeling guilty.

She supposed that, now the holidays were looming just around the corner, she had realized even more so how important it was for Ryan to get the rest of the money. Her mind had become defiant, and it blocked out any of her usual strong sense of morale. It didn't seem to matter so much to her anymore whether she robbed a gas station or an empty house at nighttime, just as long as she was helping Ryan.

Ella still wasn't quite sure she liked this new, hardened version of herself.

After school that Wednesday, Ella had sat on the living room couch to watch television. She turned on the afternoon news, the faint sounds of Rosie making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich resonating outwards from the kitchen. It was likely that there was to be another snow storm later that week, and Ella only wanted to see the weather to find out what day it would be.

But the weather wasn't on yet, and Ella saw something else she wished she hadn't.

It was a news report on the same convenience store she and Ryan had stolen from. Her heartbeat quickly increased and she stared, fixated, as the camera panned over a view of the store from the outside.

"A suspected male and female of the same age, roughly early twenties. There were two witnesses to the crime, but neither were available for comment. The robbery occurred around 3 a.m. and, unfortunately, security footage reveals little to nothing about the suspects."

Ella's grip tightened around the remote control. She could still hear Rosie in the kitchen, the clink of a butter knife against ceramic plate unmistakable. The TV screen glowed as it switched to a shot of the blonde news anchor, and Ella couldn't look away.

"Both suspects' facial features were mostly covered during the robbery," the woman said through pastel-pink lips. Her voice was impassive, her eyes staring easily into the camera as though she had no reason to truly care about the story she was reporting. Ella wondered if she would sound more interested if she knew the reason as to why the convenience store had been robbed in the first place.

"Sources tell us both suspects are Caucasian. The male suspect is thought to have dark hair, and the female to have light brown hair. Please be warned that these suspects may be extremely dangerous. If anyone has any information regarding the suspects or robbery, they are advised to contact state police – "

She could hear Rosie shuffling across the tiled flooring of the kitchen, and she immediately detached herself from the trance she'd been in. Ella reached for the remote and switched the channel.

Her expression had remained neutral the entire time.

x x x

The freezing night air was crisp against Ella's cheeks. She was sat in the passenger seat of Ryan's truck, the window rolled down just a crack to let in the cold winter air. It was just after midnight on Friday night, and Ryan had just parked half a block down from a New Hampshire gas station. It had been a three hour drive, but Ella had told her parents she was sleeping over at Nina's so they were able to leave earlier than usual.

It was the first time in a while that Ella had been able to leave without sneaking out. She couldn't say she missed the treacherous climb down from her bedroom window to the icy and snowy ground below, and leaving her house normally in her mom's Honda had been a welcome change.

Everything was silent. Both Ryan and Ella had dressed completely in black and were slouched low in their seats, eyes fixed forwards at the slightly distant glow of the store's lights. They were watching to ensure no one else was parked in the gas station's lot, since it was still a little earlier in the night than they usually did this. They were both a bit paranoid since what had happened last time, when they had tried the convenience store during the day and things had nearly ended very, very badly.

Without a word, Ryan handed one of the patterned handkerchiefs to Ella. She took it from him, her palm feeling the black and white swirled fabric in the dark. Tucking her French braid out of the way, Ella placed the handkerchief over her mouth and nose and tied it tightly behind her head. Her breath unfurled from between red painted lips and warmed the fabric under her nose.

"I don't see anyone," Ryan said, breaking the silence with a low voice. He unzipped the duffel bag that was tucked against his lap and reached inside.

Two days ago, Ryan had bought a fake gun. He'd gotten it at a party store that Ella would have described best as sketchy, and he had shown the item to Ella afterwards to prove to her that it was only made of plastic. Despite herself, Ella had had difficulty believing him when he said it wasn't real.

"No more secrets," Ryan had told her that evening. He had looked her dead in the eye when he'd said it, not glancing away or even blinking to hint that he was hiding anything. "I won't lie to you again."

Ella had believed him. Something had shifted inside her ever since the incident at the convenience store, and she suddenly felt something for Ryan that was much more powerful than it had been before. Ella was whole-heartedly invested in him, and she knew she couldn't pull herself away even if she had wanted to.

He handed the fake gun to Ella. She took it carefully in her hand, the cool plastic feeling oddly calming against her hot skin. Ryan pulled out the real gun and held it tightly; she couldn't see well in the low lighting, but she was sure he was gripping the handle with everything he had.

Ella reached over the center console and slipped her hand into the space between his right thumb and palm, squeezing his hand gently. His voice hadn't shook when he'd spoken, hadn't given away any sign that he was nervous, but Ella knew exactly how he was feeling. She could sense his anxiety in the very air around them, and she knew because she felt the same way.

Her heart pounded against the bones of her ribcage, fluttering erratically and pressing against her sternum as though it wanted to shatter its way out into the open. Ella felt Ryan squeeze her hand in the darkness, and she swallowed hard.

"Ready, Ella Jane?"

He was watching her now, his blue irises glowing against the dim light of the gas station's parking lot. She focused on his eyes, and she sucked in a breath at the feeling of falling through thin air. Ella tightened her grip on the handle of the fake pistol, expression hidden behind the black and white patterned handkerchief.

"I'm ready. Let's do it."