Virtually In Love With You

"A dating site."

"Yes."

"A dating site."

"Uh-huh."

"A dating site."

"For some reason, I feel like we just went through this."

I stopped eating my Lucky Charms and narrowed my eyes at Jack.

"Hell no."

He sighed. "Nate, you need to see someone. A girl."

"Oh, yeah? What if I'm gay?"

"Then I'd support you."

I shrugged and turned back to my cereal, carefully avoiding the yellow marshmellows. Those things were gross.

"Please Nate."

Damn. I looked up, and he whipped out the Bambi eyes. I swore.

"Fuck."

He smirked. "I'll leave you to your online dating. If you don't sign up, I'll know."

No doubt. For some reason, he knew everything. It kinda freaked me out.

"Yes, Jack."

"Good." He strutted from the room. I groaned and typed in the address.

"This is so gay," I muttered as various perfect looking couples popped up. It was fairly easy, and soon I was faced with a dilemma.

My username. I smirked and typed it in. Fun_Guy

Ha. I'm so funny.

*

"Hey! You have a suggestion."

"Go away, creep."

Jack leaned forward pointedly. "Hit the button, Nathanial."

"Nooope."

"Hit. The. Button."

"Fine!"

God, I was such a pushover. I supposed Jack was quite manipulative, though... and terrifying. Lets not forget terrifying.

Jack began to read the selected person outloud. "Username: FloraAzul. Gender: Female. Age: Unknown."

"I can read, Jack," I sighed, shoving him off the computer chair. I continued reading her interests: reading, mechanics, tumblr, hacking, technical stuff, music,. Since music was a link, I hit it.

"Read it to me!" Jack yelled.

"Okay, okay. She likes reading, mechanics, tumblr, hacking, technical stuff-"

"What the hell is 'technical stuff?'"

"How am I to know? And music. Her favorite artists are someone named 'Joe', Hello World, Fun, the Format, Anthallo, Steel Train."

Jack perked up. "Coincidence? I think not."

I ignored him. "Here's her bio."

"Ooo, spill!" Sometimes I wonder if Jack was secretly a teenage girl.

"Hey, whoever is reading this. If it's Joe and Eric, you guys are going down! I cannot believe you made me do this. Anyways, I like to fix cars, and I'm quite experienced in software, programs, hacking, ect. I like to read books, but I prefer articles. Hmm... I adore tumblr, I could (and have) spend hours on it. Besides that..."

"Interesting, add her," Jack advised. I hit the plus sign, because she could be cool. I don't know!

"Why am I even here? I'm Nate fucking Ruess. I could date anybody."

"Yep, but do you really want to date some sort of plastic blonde?"

I pondered this. "Fine. Where's Andrew?"

"How am I to know? Probably with Jill."

"Mmm. Lets go on Tumblr."

"You guys are soulmates."