All I Care About

The Explosion

Sehun grabbed his toothbrush and squirted a ridiculous amount of toothpaste on it because it simply didn't matter. Right now he was focused on his mission to ignore the gnawing ache in his chest. He simply wants to forget about the reason why that ache is there in the first place. It's cowardly of him, and it reflects poorly on him as a person, but honestly, at the moment that's all he wants to do. To ignore. To forget.

As he brushed his teeth, he kept his eyes on his reflection in the mirror. He noticed that he didn't look as angry as he felt, which, now that he thought about it, was a good thing. It was hard enough for him to tell Luhan that he was mad, but if he actually looked the part..... Sehun shook his head and continued brushing.

The door opened and Sehun turned his head only to find Luhan staring right at him. Sehun could see the confusion in his eyes. He could also see a hint of hurt, and Sehun feels that ache again. Sehun willed himself to look away – to ignore it. He turned his attention back to the mirror in front of him, and focused on brushing, his hand moving rapidly.

"We have to talk," Luhan said, voice completely serious, but Sehun could sense a little hesitation behind the words.

Sehun doesn't say anything.

"Fine – after we brush our teeth," Luhan said hurriedly as he entered the bathroom and grabbed his toothbrush – a Bambi one that Kyungsoo had gotten him for his birthday.

While Luhan kept his eyes on Sehun's reflection the whole time, Sehun didn't bother to look at the other boy. It was easier that way. He had a strong feeling that if he was to look at Luhan, all of his anger would crumble, the ache would consume him, and he'd just end up feeling like a horrible, jealous boyfriend – which is not what he wants to admit right now. No.

Sehun finished and quickly left the bathroom, ignoring the surprise look on Luhan's face.

"Se--hun," Luhan called out, voice muffled due to the paste in his mouth. "Wait."

Sehun turned off the lights in their room, pulled back the covers and got under it. He just wanted to sleep. To get this day over with.

But Luhan was having none of it.

The older boy flipped the switch as soon as he entered the room and pulled the covers off of Sehun. "Sehun, we have to talk," Luhan demanded. He got on the bed and sat next to Sehun, his eyes fixed on Sehun, who was refusing to meet his eyes. "I need to know why you're --"

"I'm tired. Can we not?" Sehun snatched the covers back, surprising Luhan, who looked like he couldn't believe what was happening.

"Sehun-ah, I'm – I'm sorry," Luhan said, voice alarmingly desperate. "I'm sorr--"

Sehun snapped his head around to look at Luhan.

"Don't apologize," Sehun said, his voice cold. "That's the last thing I want to hear right now."

"But I--"

Sehun abruptly sat up. "You don't have to apologize for something you didn't do wrong."

Luhan furrowed his eyebrows. "But --"

"You had fun today. There's nothing wrong with that. So don't," Sehun stated plainly.

"Sehun-ah, I don't understand..."

"You got to meet one of your idols. You got to see his studio. Heck, you had dinner with the man. I'm sure you had an awesome time, so please don't say sorry. It doesn't make any sense for you to."

"But you're mad, and I don't want us to fight and --"

"We're not fighting," Sehun deadpanned. He laid back down, doing his best not to show his discomfort. His head was throbbing, and he honestly was too tired for this. "I'm tired, Lu. Please turn off the lights."