Jokes because why not

Boy and his family

So there was a dad with his son in the car on the way home from the shop
A police car drives past and the dad doesn't have his seatbelt on so he says 'bastard'
The boy asks what 'bastard means and the dad says 'uhh it's another name for a policeman'
So the son just shakes it off and says okay.
They come home when his brother comes downstairs from taking a shower
The brother slips on the doormat and and says 'shit!'
The boys shit what 'shit' means so the brother says 'uhh its another word for a doormat'
So the boy walks into the kitchen and sees his mum carving a turkey but she cuts herself and says 'fuck!'
The son says 'mummy what does fuck mean?'
The mum says 'oh um honey it's just another word for a turkey, go upstairs and see what your dad is doing'
The boy goes upstairs and sees his dad shaving but the dad cuts his chin and says 'wanker!'
The boy asks what 'wanker' means and the dad says 'it's another name for shaving--' *knock knock knock*
The son says 'I'll get it'
The boy goes the answer the door and when he opens it there's a policeman
So the boy says 'oh hello bastard wipe you're feet on the shit before you come in, my mums in the kitchen fucking a turkey and my dads upstairs having a wank'