A Short Note To Hiddles (a Tom Hiddleston fan fiction)

A Short Note To Hiddles (a short fanfic about Tom Hiddleston)

Chapter 1

"Nicole, I won't do this anymore" Andrew said, "We're done. This whole thing, it was a lie. I don't love you. I never have, never will"

Those words stung my heart. It was only a week ago that he said he loved me, that he would always be there for me. I couldn't keep myself together anymore. I was beginning to love someone and...it was just a lie?!

The thought kept going through my head, but I still couldn't believe it. I stared into his eyes trying to find something in them that would tell me he was lying about this or that maybe he was being forced to do this, but there was none.

"I..." I started to speak, but I couldn't continue. I was just too lost.

"I'm jut too good for you Nicole," with those last painful words, he left me in the pouring rain in the middle of London.

I ran.

I ran all the way home in my drenched shoes that were clearly not meant to be worn in the rain.

I fumbled around for my key but someone opened the door before I did. My mother stood at the door.

Shit.

I barely got a word out before she grabbed me by my wet braids and dragged me inside the house.

"I told you to be home before eight, you little shit, this is the seventh time this week you disobey me! And to make it worse, you didn't tell me where the hell you were going!" Then she slapped me across the face. It stuck, like always, but I refused to show it had affected me either way.

She knew I was distressed, but she was not a compassionate person. What happened in my life never mattered to her. I knew she hated me....that she didn't care.

"When you leave the house, I expect to know where you are, what you're doing, and who you're doing it with. I don't want the police knocking on my door at some ungodly hour of the night telling me they found you dead in a ditch! Not that it really matters to me if you end up in some ditch, but I really don't need the trouble!" She yelled in my face.

I wasn't in the mood to put up with her shit.

I ran to the stairs with every intention to disappear in my room for the rest of my life, but before I went up I notice my father trying to come down. I say "trying'" because he was hopelessly failing. He looked a bit pale and I could tell he had come home drunk again.

"Move it you little shit", he said pushing me away as he stumbled down the last few steps.

I took a few steps away from him and waited for him to pass and made my way upstairs. I was at the door of my room before I paused to listen to their argument.

"It's not my fault that good for nothing daughter of yours turned out the way she did!" my father yelled.

"Well if you weren't drunk all the time maybe she would be worth taking care off!" my mother countered, also yelling.

"If you don't get her under control I will, and it's not gonna be pretty" my dad said harshly.

Get me under control? I was hardly a rebellious teenager.

" How about you get a real job and get some money for this family; then at the very least we could afford to take care of our son " my mom spat.

Their son.

My little brother.

They only cared for him. That's how it had always been. I was the mistake that showed up at an inopportune moment of my mother's life that changed and ruined her life. She was in sixth form when she got pregnant and dropped out of school. My father married my mother only two years later and have lived miserably ever since. My brother was planned. I still don't know why they wanted to screw up another child, but they had their reasons.

I walked into my room only to find my little brother using my laptop, answering my emails.

"What the Hell are you doing?!" I yelled. I forcibly pushed him out of my chair and shut my laptop.

He gave me a wry smile and ran out of my room yelling, "Mum! Nicole hit me!"

The little brat lied again. My mother was at my door in seconds.

"How dare you hit my son like that?!" she yelled.

"I didn't, he's lying!" I defended. I knew it was useless to argue, but it couldn't hurt to try.

My little brother is an "angel that came down from heaven" to my parents.

"That's it! I am sick of your constant lies! Nicole, you're in Year 13 and you're so stupid to do anything with your life; you wont even get into college. I am done caring for the worthless piece of shit that you are! So I am done with you. From now on, if you want to live under this roof, you have to pay rent and you provide your own food and necessities. You call me Mrs. William as you are no daughter of mine anymore!" My mother disowned me.

"You can't be serious!" I yelled, "I don't even have a job and I work my ass off in school!"

"Rent is £500 a month, starting next month," with that she slammed the door of my room and left.

£500! It might as well have been a million pounds, I couldn't possibly afford that! I flopped onto my bed defeated and cried. I lost track of the hours that past but I cried until I had no tears left. I blew my nose and trudged to my laptop. I changed my password and scrolled through Tom Hiddleston's tweets. Why? you may ask. He was the only person in the world that could make me smile. He was the most amazing person I had seen, though I had never even met him.

Reader, since you took the time to read this far into my miserable existence (God knows why), there are a few things you should know:

My name is Nicole Williams. I'm seventeen years old and I live in London. I worked hard in school, I really did, and I'm sure I would have had no trouble passing my classes if I had had the energy and will to get up in the morning every day. In other words, I was basically worthless. My mother was right about nothing coming out of my life. My existence was a mistake in the first place, and the rest of it will be the same. I was nobody to this world, and I was learning to accept that. The world was too big for me to be anything or make a difference. As for my family, I guess I deserved everything they did to me since I didn't deserve my life to begin with. I had yet to meet someone in my life that cared, and I guess that's because there are none. No one looked at a girl like me twice. My professors had no reason to care for me (in fact, I'm sure they all detested me), and I had no one to call friend. I thought things were getting better at one point. Two months ago, Andrew Howard approached me. He asked if I wanted to go out with him, and I, being the idiot I was, said yes. It was all I had ever dreamed it would be, but it was a dream indeed. As it turned out, it was a dare gone wrong that led him to me. It must have been pity that kept him around until now. All you really need to know about me is that I was a worthless waste of space; well that's what everyone says anyways. To strangers I passed while walking around the streets, I'm sure my world seemed perfect. They just didn't know how to look past the smile I hid behind. They would never know the hell I lived in.

I grabbed a knife from my drawers and pulled my sleeves up revealing various scars, some of which hadn't healed yet. I pressed the knife to my arm and smoothly slit my wrist. I watched blood flow from the cut.I tried to quit once, but I couldn't. I needed it. It was my way out. I dropped the knife on the floor and walked to my window. I don't know how many times I had thought of jumping out, but it wasn't high enough to cause much damage.

Tom Hiddleston was the only reason I was still breathing. He was the only reason I had decided to go through another day of torture. No, I wan't an obsessive fangirl who had nothing better to do with her time than stalk celebrities. Tom was just my inspiration, my reason to keep living. The hope that one day things would be bearable.

But in my heart I knew it wouldn't.