Wondering if I'll survive.

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Back in good health, Castiel was a huge hero in saving my life. I was going to bleed out, I was going to die but luckily, praying to him - he showed up in seconds. Fixing me up, good as new. Dean was pissed, I expected that but Spencer and Sam understood and it's so hard to believe that it's over, that no one else will get hurt. Mike also was healed by Castiel and I'm so thankful for that.

The police raided Toby's apartment, finding his schemes and plans through out his place. Apparently he was vengeful from the past, from what we did to Jenna, what happened with Alison - he took it out on all of us and Spencer leaving him was the last straw, he cracked and then the new -A was born.

It's been a six months since it's all been over with and though -A is gone, Spencer and I are both on alert nearly all the time. It's only with help from our amazing family that we are able to calm down, understand that it's over and done with but we were so use to having to hide and keep secrets to ourselves that, its hard to readjust to a normal - well, half normal life. I've picked up hunting alongside Sam and Dean, something to keep my mind off of the pain of my past, the pain we all had to go through. I want every monster gone, every single one, and this is the only way I see that happening.

Alora is now a six months and five days, still so new to this world and I want to protect her from everything. She is still a daddy's girl and I can still see why, he is our protector, our rock - he is everything to us. He's been such a good father, still hunting - of course and I understand that, that's what he loves - its part of him and its his legacy. I will never, ever stop him from hunting. I've picked up writing again, putting pen to paper seems easier said then done. I've got a few chapters now, rough copy and I can't help but think, is this the right thing to write about? Writing about my entire life, Sam and Dean, my friends and family. Who knows if I'll even ever publish it.

I sit Alora down in her high chair, giving her a bottle and cleaning up the mess on her tray. The boys being out on a hunt and Spencer going to college, when she was in Rosewood, she never completed college and now that she's here, she wants to be able to finish, to have a steady job and I admire that, Sam must be thrilled since she's going for Law, just like he did and just like her parents did.

I take out the broom and put music on from my cellphone, the song ' My sacrifice by creed' lingering through the house, not too loud but not too quite. Alora loves music and luckily, Dean and I do have similar taste in music. Then again, I like really anything when it comes to genres, all music is beautiful.

Alora giggling and smashing her hands together as the song played on, "When you are with me, I'm free. I'm careless, I believe.." I trailed off in song, Alora making noises as I sang with a joyful smile on her face, bouncing back and forth with the music. "Above all the others, we'll fly. this brings tears to my eyes, my sacrifice." I heard a familiar voice come into the kitchen and sing, turning around to see Dean standing there with a wide smile "I don't get why you pretend you can't sing." I shook my head, I had heard Dean sing many of times and believe it or not, he had a beautiful voice but he chose to keep it hidden "I missed you." He murmured, coming up and placing a soft, feather like kiss on my lips. "I missed you." I whispered back, he dropped his bags and made his way to Alora, pulling her out of her highchair and holding her in his arms "And of course, I missed you." He spoke to Alora with the brightest smile and shine in his eyes. "Well now that you're here, we can sing together." I smiled over at him, Dean gave a shrug of his lips as the song changed "Oh when I look back now, that summer seemed to last forever and if I had the choice Yeah, I'd always wanna be there, Those were the best days of my life." Dean and I sang to Alora, Dean dancing around with her as I watched in awe. How did I get so lucky.

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