My Princess

Chapter 11

FAVORITE CHAPTER RIGHT HERE!!! <3

Ps this poem thing at the beginning is not all my words! It is my favorite song and I just added in some words so it was easier to understand.

Hold your head up- Macklemore

***ROSES POV***

There is something you must know:

Don't Ever give up.

There is always a light in the sky. Life might be hard and you feel like you want to disappear but you must try to survive. Each moment's precious, so don't let life pass you by Keep focused, and remember your prize. A friend of mine once told me, We have many paths in this journey. They act in different ways So when you don't understand why life is bad don't be worried, Your paths not a wrong one- Beauty can be found in all of them. You'll meet people whose paths intersect But you don't know how long you'll walk with them,and you'll never know how long we'll continue with our loved ones down this scary road. The path veers and it's clear that we might fight alone. I've learned if you can't hold on to that moment that is right now- Let it go. Cause' freedom is god Freedom is acknowledging the mask you have on, And possessing the strength to take it off. Freedom is accepting every step of the path And when it's hard to go on, you are still far along. And this is it.

My friend told me something that opened up my eyes," The brighter the light, the darker the shadow" Its hard to understand and right now I don't know, So I just go with what was destined. Life can be a burden or a blessing, You might not live life or to live it to the fullest. But the choice is yours. It's there if you want it, you got it, now let go. Everyone has problems, and life must go down, But where's the up? People stuck with the bad life, and never smiling face. Then there is the moment of a man choosing what path they will go down Do I give in, give up, or get up and live right now? And hopefully... You pick yourself up, and live right now. You're born into this world alone and if you live you won't go out alone. You cant only trust yourself and depend on the help of the pound. Inside the heart that beats with the breath of the now. Life is horrible, people die, people are evil, but You can withstand this world, but it seems so foul. Flood of emotions, it's like I'm being held down to drown. Hell might be right around the corner, but You can always turn it around. You always have a choice, no matter the situation, you're not always bound to nothing good, no one nice. You're chosen for this job, This is your life, you can't escape this thing when it's hard. Just know that it passes, but you'll collect scars- They will never go away, but they will make you who you are. Life is a beautiful struggle,

We can't control this, remember: the moment's beyond us.

So hold Your Head Up. You are alive for a reason, you can chose how your life goes with the way your mind is set and never give up because of struggles. There will be something beautiful waiting.

I realize now that I have a few beautiful things that i have to live for.

1) Joy Elizabeth, my princess. I knew that life was horrible, my ex was terrible, my family gone, and I was ready to give up. But I had to protect Her. I couldn't send my child away, so I kept her, and kept myself alive as well.

2) One Direction they gave me advice told me all the right things and honestly have patched up my life, when I was empty.

The reason I tell you these things and this advice is because I need to remind my self this also. I can't give up no matter how hard this life is, no matter how many things go wrong, there is always a light in the sky even if it hiding behind the clouds.

Some things came up recently... At the nursing home my dad goes to there was a fire. My dad was involved in it. He wasn't hurt, but he started the fire. He, of course, with the short temper he has, tried to start it. The workers made him mad because they were telling him what to do. He went into the kitchen and threw a towel on the burners on the stove. The kitchen went up in flames, and he was sent home. The damage was pretty bad in the kitchen and a wall in the dinning hall. They knew he was dangerous, but are still very mad that he would do such a thing. The worst part is they are not allowing him back there until I pay for all damage. I do not have the money though, and I don't have a job. I can't get a job because I have a daughter I need to watch and a dad that can't stay home alone. The guys started some photo shoots, and I don't want to bug them with my problems. And Joy is coming down with a cold. When she gets colds she can't sleep, which means both of us are up at night. I can't solve any of my problems and its killing me.

I can't solve these problems alone, but I have no one to help me. I haven't seen the guys in a few days, and obviously my family is gone. Jase contacted me and we were going to meet up, but I can't tell him my problems. This stress is killing me. I hate being a girl. Im always so emotional. These little problems I have make me burst into tears. Tears constantly stream down my face when I think about my life. Nothing seems to go right.

Last week ,before the Jase thing, life seemed amazing. Every time life goes good, though, bad things happen. God just tests you again. This isn't a bad thing though, everytime you are tested by Him, your faith gets stronger. Same goes for tests in relationships. You fight but get stronger in the end (if it was meant to be).

DING

My phone beeped indicating one if the guys texted me.

"From: Nialler :p

Hey! Just checking up on you! How are you doing? Btw what is with the weather??

To: me."

"From: Me

Oh hey Nialler! Things are ok could be better... And get with the program! Michigan is surrounded by lakes there is no predicting the weather! Don't you love the snow?

To Nialler :p"

It's nice to know that Niall cares! I'm defiantly closer to him then any of the other guys.

"To: me

Love the snow! Lol I'm comin over to talk to you! You better be at home!

From: Nialler"

I sat back In my chair. I sat and thought about Niall. I can tell he cares about me and Joy. I wouldn't mind help but I don't want to take advantage of him. He is so sweet though! He texts me to check up on me, and is so nice and patient. He is adorable to! He is like a kid but not annoyingly childish. Not to mention his beautiful voice, his brotherly love with the other guys, his eyes you can get lost in, and beautiful looks. He seems like a perfect guy.

He is great with kids. He is welcoming. He is always serving others. His amazing accent. His cuteness, but not traditional cuteness. His perfect hair that looks so soft. The way he gives hugs. The smell that invades my brain. His-

Dangit.... I have feelings for Niall Horan....