A Dime A Dozen(BatJokes)

A Dime A Dozen

This was based off a prompt I found online: "Imagine your OTP getting caught stealing coins from a fountain in the mall."

Sidenote: Yes, I did draw the cover pic on my 3ds. Then I edited a bit on Paint. I'm studying the ways of drawing like the new animated series for this fandom and my future fanfictions.

Today was the day of the unveiling of a new 'supermall' in Gotham City; they were allowed to name malls that way if they gave Superman royalties.

An announcer cut the ribbon to the entrance, and people gathered inside the supermall to gawk at all the overly priced stores that sold items only people with fat wallets could afford. Bruce Wayne being one of them. He was on a hot date with a visiting supermodel who he promised to take on a sightseeing tour of Gotham. This was just one of the events he was taking her to.

Charlene held tightly to his arm as she pointed out all the jewelry and other items that caught her liking. Thinking maybe if she held tight enough and acted more attractive he could buy one for her.

Golddiggers. Bruce knew how to deal with them as much as Batman knew how to deal with criminals.

Both involved stepping over a body and walking away.

Bruce on the other hand caught something he liked too. Well, he liked it well enough for him to look at it so long. And this wasn't much of an 'it', it was more of a 'who', and who this was caught Bruce Wayne's concern.

He saw the Joker, Clown Prince of Crime, fishing in the mall's centerpiece, a diamond studded fountain, which statured some rich nobody who probably founded the mall in the first place. By fishing he means that the Joker was elbow deep in water that was probably cleaner than what was provided in Gotham's common households, with rolled up purple suit sleeves stealing whatever loose change he could find.

Probably even before Bruce could get a good look at him you could tell he already stepped into the water because way below the knees his pants were soaked. He probably got out because he might have drawn attention.

Every time someone walked by, Joker would just face the other way in hopes of not getting caught. Who was he fooling? Bruce was able to witness a young couple walk by, and they must've noticed it was actually the Joker thrifting from a fountain mall.

"Honey is that really the Joker?" asked the girl to her boyfriend.

"Yeah, and he sure is real ugly up close, look at that devilish smile."

Joker looked up from his work to see a couple gawking at him from another side of the fountain. "What? Is it the flower? You want a whiff?" Joker giggled and came dangerously close to them that the couple ran away screaming.

He scratched his head in confusion. "Great. They'll bring more than that's coming from." Mall cops in general. And not the happy fat kind.

Charlene gasped. She saw a shiny gold ring on display in the window of a popular jewelry store. "I would love a ring like that, ever thought to give a girl a ring?" Charlene let her available fingers dance along Bruce's arm as they walked past. Bruce knew what she was hinting at.

The model noticed that his attention was on something else.

"What is it Brucey? It better not be about another girl." Charlene flirted.

"No. No it's not," Bruce held her aside with his arm, "Excuse me for second I have to go check this out."

"Don't take any longer than a minute!" she catcalled.

"Joker." Bruce called after him. The name sounded more like a love-struck gasp than the deep growling one he's used to. And he didn't really mean for the name to emit that way.

"Now here's a looker," Joker wasn't exactly upset that his work was being interrupted again, but this was a very rare and interesting confrontation. "Boy billionaire-"

He was cut off by Bruce, "What do you think you're doing stealing coins from inside a fountain, and scaring innocent shoppers?" He made it sound more like a casual question than the direct ones Batman's used to. If he was in costume they would already be on the floor... punching each other in the face.

"What? I thought they'd like to smell it." Joker said innocently. He even added a cute little shrug. The smug clown.

Joker rolled down his sleeves, which were also wet because of how deep the fountain was.

Bruce Wayne didn't respond. He only gave him one of those cold, hard, Batman glares. The one that he's used to, which meets rebellious green eyes.

By breaking the ice Joker added, "I-I was doing this for a friend. Two-Face, but you may know him as Harvey Dent. You may also know that the guy has a kink for coins." Joker slightly titled his head as both men kept a hard lock-on eye contact. "This is a little early birthday present."

Charlene was left alone to be confronted by five flirty men who she had no interest in. Well maybe one, the last guy was cute. But she was also wondering what her date was doing.

She noted Bruce over by the fountain getting in some creepy clown's face who had this hideous smile and, the lipstick was on point, but the real problem was why he was over there. Was he flirting with this man? He wasn't selling any balloons, and not the good kind which you can make walk around with you.

Charlene strutted right up to Bruce and infiltrated- with worry.

"Brucey what's the issue?" Charlene tried so hard not to whine.

Just like how hard Bruce was trying to not punch Joker in the face and go Batman on that clown.

If Bruce looked hard enough he could see the bag of soaking wet coins hiding behind Joker, but it was easily noticeable. Bruce's eyes were on the Joker alone at this moment and the clown planned to keep it this way. Until a good looking lady came up to them and addressed Bruce.

"Ahem, and who is this beauty?" Joker questioned, hoping to be introduced.

Bruce remembered he left his date back on the other side on the mall. She was waiting for him to come back for a long time now. It alarmed him. "Oh, uh, where are my manners? Charlene, Joker. Joker, Charlene. She's a supermodel. And this man here, Joker, Batman's top priority, I-I mean Gotham's most notorious villain. I'm not Batman." Bruce ranted nervously.

"Charmed." Charlene chimed in with a forced smile, nowhere near as wide as Joker's but just as welcoming.

"And it's more than a pleasure to meet you Miss," Joker flirted while kissing the model's hand. She was obviously disgusted. Whatever relationship this man- correction, clown had with Bruce Wayne it certainly must not be any good.

A pretty blonde girl dressed as a harlequin with a chest size far beyond the supermodel's called after the Joker. "Mistah J you done over there?"

"Coming Harley!" Joker yelled after her. "Look, Bruce. I have to go." He motioned toward his anxious girlfriend and revealed a large wet sack of coins that he could hardly carry on his own.

Mall cops started chasing after Harley Quinn but they slipped on the water dripping from the bag, and they fell like dominos. Literally.

"Don't worry, I'll give you a percent of the profits. All the rich fat cats dumped their loose change in here." Joker winked at Bruce and flicked a dime at him. He laughed at the cop's domino effect, while running from backup police.

"If I were you I would not get wrapped into anything affiliated with that clown." Charlene snarled as if she was giving him advice.

Bruce held the coin between his two fingers, examining the texture, and watched Joker escape though the entrance.

"Don't worry, I know a guy who does."