For the 431st time, I paced the length of my living room.
To put it simply...
I'M AN IDIOT.
A freaking retard. I should never have told them... The face reveal thing we have scheduled is in less than 2 hours, and I'm kinda freaking out about it. JUST kinda.
How will Evan react when he sees me? And the guys too? Totally NOT just Evan. But...
I'm still worried that they'll think I look like how the fan fictions describe me. Cute. I mean, I'm pretty skinny although strong, but still. I'm pretty tall. And if I were to be cuddling with Evan, I would probably have to be the big spoon... Not that I'm worried about that happening or anything, he'd never like me. And I DONT like him... Not even a little bit... I think...
NEVERMIND.
As the clock strikes 11, my fear rises to a whole new level. I want to back out so bad, I'm so scared... But with what Evan said, I should at least... I think I'm on the edge of having some sort of nervous breakdown.
Maybe I could just call them and say that I got sick or some shit like that.
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.
Another minute on the clock passes.
Before I even knew what I was doing, I had picked up the landline and dialed Evans number. Please Evan, please pick up...
Another minute. 58 more till my impending doom...
I started to do a little whimper like thing that involved the trembling of my entire body.
Two rings...
Three...
Four..
One more till voicemail..
"Yeah Del?" Said Evan, sounding gruff and rushed. He might have just done something, considering it was only around eight his time.
"EVAN!" I sighed/screamed into the phone.
"Are you okay? I'm sorry for not picking up, I was just was showering... I had a long night." He said.
My heart broke a little to find out he wasn't as nervous for my face reveal as I was, but the second I thought of him in just a towel my face heated up a little. I'm glad we weren't on the Skype call yet.
"No... I'm just really nervous." Understatement of the year...
"Is this still about your face reveal? Del, I'm sure you look GREAT. If anyone's not ok with your face, then they're a giant asshole." He reassured. "Dude, c'mon, the guys will be fine with your face. Trust me."
Then all of a sudden, I realized something.
When the guys get mobbed by random fans and post shit on Twitter, how am I going to fit into the picture?
Shit. Shit. I did not think this through... But I've already established that, so...
"EvanWhatAboutTheFans ThatWe'llMeetThere? EvanI'mNotSureICanDoThis..." I yelled, almost screaming into the receiver. I continued to rock in place.
"Oh..." He said quietly.
Shit.
"Well, I was just thinking that you could do the face reveal for your fans before we leave? Like within... A week or something? If not- Well- I'm sure we could work something out..."
"NO!" I screamed, throwing the phone on the ground.
AGHH!! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!
After five minutes of an internal breakdown, I shakily picked up the phone. "Sorry..." I mumbled. "I just had a bit of a..." Should I say it? "Meltdown..." I said, half as loud as I had started off saying. "Sorry I'm just really nervous- Evan I'm not sure if I can do this- I'm just not really ready to show... My fans... It's just... I DUNNO!" I mumbled/yelled.
"Hey, hey Del... It's ok... It'll be fine... Trust me... We've been imagining your face for so long that no matter what you look like it'll be better than how we've imagined... And you can't back out now! We've been waiting to see YOU! You know how long I've wanted to hear you promise a face reveal! FOREVER! And it's the same with everyone else!"
Evan was shouting now.
Before I could say anything, my heart lodged in my chest a little. It was a foreign feeling, a little good and a little crazy. But I guess... I'm delirious.
The feels...
"Really?" I said, probably sounding a lot more meek than I meant to be.
"YES!" Evan shouted.
The heart-lodged-in-chest feeling came back. A feeble smile crawled on my face, a little crack of joy in this tide of fear. Yeah. I can do this.
"Thanks Evan." I said.
"I CAN DO THIS!" I shouted. Then I hung up and ran to my recording room, as it was already 11:30.
~~le time skip~~
I was sitting cross legged in my spinny chair, then legs crossed, then legs straight. Then legs crossed again cause I realized that no matter what angle my camera was turned at, the guys couldn't see my legs.
I tapped the keyboard a little faster. My knee bounced a little bit more.
The 'I AM WILDCAT has joined the chat emblem appeared at the top right corner of the screen. All the others had face cams set up and were talking and laughing as the 'MooSnuckel has joined the chat' thing blinked. Mini, Vanoss, Terroriser, Lui, Marcel, and Nogla were already there.
That was everyone.
Except my face cam stayed blank, like normal...
"C'mom Delirious, turn on the camera already!" yelled Moo good-naturedly, even though he had joined less than five minutes ago. "Yeah! We didn't stay up till five just to hear you back out!" Yelled Terroriser. Sometimes I forget he was five hours ahead of me.
"Yeah Del!" Shouted Evan, giving his signature smirk. He was almost as quiet as I was tonight.
I gulped.
"So... When is the beach house thing again?" I stuttered nervously, trying to hide the teetering in my voice. This might have been the fourth time I've asked the same question just in the past thirty minutes.
"Dude, that has to be the fifth time you asked that just tonight!" Mini shouted, still joking.
I CAN DO IT! Was my last thoughts as I removed the black piece of paper from my face cam.
~~~
END CHAP
~~~
Well sheet... Even I'm excited of the next chapter... And sorry for no updates for like a week, I just started school. And EVERYONE knows how that is... **shudders**
YOU ARE READING
H2Ovanoss <3
FanfictionVanoss has it all, and more. Minus the big hole in his life he fills with sad hope and midnights spent at bars. Delirious is... Somewhat weird, if that even begins to describe him... that craves the feeling he gets with his friends. When they're br...
