Saving Grace

Chapter 8: Crushed

I woke up around ten at night still exhausted and still in Zayn’s arms. 

“Sorry…” I mumbled pulling myself away from him as I realized that I had just trapped him for the past four hours.

“Nothin’ to apologize for babe,” he replied.

“I basically just held you captive for the last four hours.”

“No one was held against their will, I like holding you.”

“Good because I like being held.”

“Feeling any better?”

“Not really, I just let out 19 years of pent up emotional damage, I’m kind of wrecked.”

“Do you think food might help? We never did get to eat.”

“You never have to ask if I’m up for food. The answer is always yes!”

“What do you want? I could probably make something.” I just stared at him doubtfully.  “Hey I made you breakfast” he defended.

“True. But let’s not push our luck” I replied patting him on the back.

“You’re probably right.  So what do you want to order?”

“Doesn’t matter to me.”

“Ya know, ninety-nine percent of the time you’re easy going and don’t really care about anything, and then there’s that one percent where someone can say the wrong thing and you get all fired up about it and you’re like this completely different person.”

“Thanks? I think?”

“It’s pretty amazing.”

“So it was a compliment?”

“It was” he chuckled. “I’ll go order some pizza.”

Zayn got up to order pizza and I went to go freshen up.  I took one look in the mirror and was repulsed; I looked like I had been run over by a steam roller.  I splashed some cold water on my face to try and help but it didn’t really do much.  I didn’t care though, I knew Zayn probably didn’t even notice, and in all honesty I probably looked worse the day I first met him.  If he wasn’t disgusted then he wouldn’t be now.  I went back into the living room and waited for our pizza.  When it finally came I devoured most of it, as usual.  For some reason when I was with Zayn, all of my body issues disappeared, probably because he looked at me as if I were a supermodel.  When we were finished eating we went to bed and I curled into his arms.  It was the only place that I felt truly safe, like nothing could hurt me. 

The next day I woke up late and Zayn had already left, he had to go into the studio, so I called up El and made plans to meet up.  I really needed some girl time after last night. I threw on some sweats before heading over to her flat.  When I arrived her kitchen looked like she had stocked up for the impending apocalypse. 

“OK! I have chocolate ice cream I have peanut butter cups I have chocolate chip cookie dough I have anything and everything for making a good ice cream sundae I have any candy you could possibly think of and then for when we get hungry and need actual food I have pasta.  I figured you could use some comfort food” she explained as she pointed out things spread across her counters. 

“Wow! This is…”

“Heaven?” she interrupted.

“I was going to go with great but heaven works to” I chuckled.

“So what do you want to drown your sorrows in first?”

“Ice cream.” I replied.

We made our ice cream sundaes and headed into her living room to talk.